Gangsta-WA-Sama?
by smashingxURxface
Summary: Sexy alien, mutant gangster girl...Has Usui finally met his match? Because Saya Minatsuki, the heiress to the Cutthroat Showdown, has caught his attention with more than just her taste in music. She seems (keyword: "seems") to be completely immune to his charm, but how long can she resist the determination of the sexy perverted alien? Read for a good laugh. OCxUsui MisakixYou-kun
1. Chapter 1: The Cutthroats

HOWDY! In this universe, **Usui and Misaki are only friends**. Because, like everyone, I want to steal Usui for my character. SO **Misaki is going to be with You-kun**, Usui is basically like an annoying big brother to Misaki in this version. This chapt is more action packed than blooming with romance, but it's the intro. Hope you like!

Disclaimer: I will be reusing some scenerios from Kaichou-wa Maid Sama as if they hadn't happened before and putting my own twist on them, but the real credit goes to the original **and all rights belong to Hiro Fujiwara, who is awesome**! Love this manga! I stole the name Saya Minatsuki from 'Black Cat' but the character personality/design is all me. And I will be referencing quite a few songs in this story, plus movie quotes. Also Im not Japanese, so if I screw up cultural stuff…PLEASE FORGIVE MY IGNORANCE! *sob*

**The following contains a dangerously sexy alien (which may result in nosebleeds),****violence, a made-up representation of gangs, inappropriate language, feats of inhuman/unrealistic strength, speed, and mutant powers that cannot be achieved in real life and should not be attempted unless you are an actual alien or mutant…**

~o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o~

"A gang fight?" Misaki repeated the 3rd idiots words and she gave You-kun a concerned look.

You-kun was Misaki's childhood friend. He had moved away when they were little, but had just recently come back and enrolled at Seika High. After he had reunited with Misaki he had confessed that he had a crush on her…and from then on he was always following her around like a puppy.

The two had been heading home from school when one of the 3 idiots had flagged them down.

"Yeah!" said Ikkun with worry (aka the Otaku of the 3 idiots) "I guess Shiroyan and Kurotatsu's old gang got mixed up with some of the Cutthroat Showdown gang! They went to go help, but it's the c-CUTTHROATS!"

"Cutthroats?" You-kun scratched his head. "The ones with those underground cage fighting tournaments?"

"THAT'S THEM! THEY"RE EXPERTS IN FIGHTING TO THE DEATH! THE CUTTHROATS! AS IN THROAT CUTTERS! PEOPLE WHO CUT THROATS! ITS SUICIDE TO GOING UP AGAINST THEM MISA-CHAN!" Ikkun cried.

"Shut up!" Misaki smacked him. "Take me to where they are fighting! I cant let them do something so stupid! It'll reflect badly on our school if they get into trouble!"

"I-is that really something to worry about at a time like this?" Ikkun sniffled.

"Of course it is!"

"Misaki-chan, you cant go to a gang fight!" You-kun protested. "It'll be too dangerous for you! Just let me go, and I'll take care of it!" You-kun smiled, sparkling with pride.

"I want to come too Prez," Usui said.

Misaki huffed at Usui's sudden presence. Usui had been hanging around her for the past few weeks after finding out she worked as a maid at Maid Latte. Apparently holding that secret over her head, and teasing her about You-kun was his only life.

"Takumi!" You-kun grouched. "Why do you always have to follow us around?!"

"To protect Misa-chan," Usui answered plainly.

Misaki started to steam with annoyance.

"She doesn't need you to protect her! I protect her!" You-kun defended stubbornly.

"I protect her from you," Usui smirked and put a hand on both Misaki and You-kun's heads. "Someone has to make sure you two don't take advantage of being alone together."

You-kun blushed and Misaki shook off Usui's hand, trying not to turn red or look at You-kun. She knew how Usui loved making them feel awkward. Usui was the only one who knew that she returned You-kun's feelings.

"Whatever! Lets just GO!"

~o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o~

Ikkun led the way and eventually the four of them reached the abandoned convenience store parking lot where the fight was apparently being held.

Misaki saw the other two idiots, Shiroyan and Kurotatsu, standing with a group of slightly younger delinquents. Gouki was among them (A/N: he's that stupid crybaby punk who kidnaps Yukimura).

_No doubt he was the cause of all this trouble, _Misaki thought, remembering how much of a hot-head the boy was.

Across the lot was another group. Just looking at them gave Misaki a chill. They had weapons, bats, chains, etc. but they were also HUGE. She knew they meant business and there was no way she could let students fight REAL gangsters.

"HEY!" she yelled at the two idiots. "What the hell do you guys think your doing?!"

"Shiroyan! Kurotatsu!" Ikkun cried.

"Prez!" Shiroyan and Kurotatsu both called and waved happily.

"Come to cheer us on?!" Shiroyan grinned. "We're gonna kick some Cutthroat butt!"

Before she could respond, the Cutthroats addressed the students.

"Think your pretty tough huh kid?" one said. "Ha! I'd like to see how long that confidence would last in the ring…"

"You should know that the Cutthroats don't take it lightly when someone trespasses on their territory," another one said. "heh, you kids shouldn't have shown up…you would've lived longer," the man smiled dangerously.

Gouki clenched his fists.

"Prepare to enter a world of pain!" the Cutthroats started to descend upon the Idiots group.

Randomly, music started playing.

"Huh?" You-kun looked around for the source of the noise.

The Cutthroats stopped dead in their tracks as a hooded figure leap down from the abandoned shop; they had an IPod in their hand and a katana on their back.

The two idiots looked at each other with panicked faces, getting a bad feeling about who it was.

"Is that the Sandlot soundtrack?" Usui asked, listening to the song.

"How should I know?" Misaki answered, not caring what he was talking about.

"You, minion," said the person in the hoody, addressing the leader of the Cutthroat group. Misaki was shocked to hear that the voice was female.

"Weapons?... REallY?!" the hooded girl chided. "There's only seven of them and you brought TEN guys with you!"

"The Boss would've wanted us to squash any threats—"

"Is my father HERE? I don't see him!" the girl interjected. "Which means that the chain of command falls to ME. Got that Sherlock? Now, ANSWER MY QUESTION!"

"W-well..."he swallowed, "Miss Minatsuki, w-we didn't know h-how many were going to show up—"

"How many times have I told you to call me Sir?!"

"YesSir! Sorry SIR! I just—"

Before he could finish she jabbed him in the neck and he choked out.

"They are barely HIGHSCHOOLERS! What honor is there in attacking a bunch of kids?! YOU ARE A DISGRACE!" she jabbed him again.

"GAH!*cough* Miss Minatsuki PLEASE!"

"Call me SIR god-DAMMIT!" she continued jabbing him as he cried.

Misaki, You-kun, and Usui: *sweatdrop*

"I knew it!" Shiroyan cried out and pointed.

"It's her!" Kurotatsu also pointed. "The shadow of the Minatsuki Clan!"

"And Heiress to the Cutthroat Showdown!" Both idiots then cringed as the girl slowly turned towards them, the shadow of her hood still obscuring her face.

"…how rude. Interrupting like that," she said coldly, "Looks like you boys ALSO need a lesson in respect."

"Uh…" Shiroyan gulped, and then whispered to his fellow idiot. "You know… she sounds like she's gonna kill us…."

"…she sounds scarier than the Prez.." Kurotatsu nodded. "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea…" the two idiots started backing away as she advanced toward them.

"HA!" Gouki sneered, "What are you two so afraid of?! Shes a girl! Now is our time to strike!"

The girl stopped and turned her head towards the new voice.

"GOUKI!"

"SHUT UP!"

"DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO SHE IS?!"

"She's the eyes and ears of the Cutthroats!" The two idiots went back and forth.

"—Said to have fists of steel!"

"—And never lost a fight in the Arena!"

"—The She-Wolf!"

"—The Gladiator!"

"—The Wildcat!"

"You know….I was going to let you off with a warning…." She let her words linger. "But I really Hate being underestimated…" Her hand flew up and every one of the idiot's group members ducked.

….but nothing happened….They peeked through their fingers and saw her scrolling on her IPod.

"…no…..nope…mmhhhh, no," she kept scrolling through her playlist.

Usui smirked as he watched her.

"Is she even taking this seriously?!" Misaki sweated.

"Haaang on….hmm, would you guys rather get your asses kicked to 'Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious' or 'Burnin Down the House'?" the girl asked blankly.

"How about 'Rock You Like a Hurricane?" Usui called from across the lot.

"What are you doing?!" Misaki whispered.

Usui only smiled and looked back at the hooded girl.

She didn't look up from her IPod, but she tilted her head, considering his suggestion.

"Nah," she shot him down.

"Then how about 'What's New Pussycat?' Eh, Wildcat?"

That comment got her attention, and the girl abruptly looked in Usui's direction.

"Usui," Misaki reproached.

"You 'Wanna Be Starting Something' wise guy?" the girl warned, trying to beat him at whatever game he was playing.

"'Give It to Me Baby'." A sly grin crossed his face as he accepted the challenge.

"'Hit the Road Jack'!" she snapped.

"Ooo, 'Foxy Lady'," Usui jeered, waving his hand coyly. Everyone just stared back and forth at the song title duel. Even the Cutthroats looked baffled by the turn of events.

_How can they respond that fast?_ Misaki thought, utterly perplexed.

" 'WHITE AND NERDY'!" the Wildcat taunted at the top of her lungs.

" 'All the girlies say Im Pretty Fly for a White Guy'," Usui corrected. The girl stammered with outrage before she could respond.

"Song titles only! You included lyrics!" she pointed a finger accusingly at him. "That means you're disqualified! CHEATER!"

"You're the one who's making up rules."

"SHUT UP SMARTASS!"

"You whine like a mule."

"USUI!" You-kun and Misaki exclaimed.

The Wildcat was blatantly offended by his teasing, her teeth set on edge as she growled with fury.

"Have you got a death wish kid?!" one of the Cutthroats shouted.

"….Im gonna murder that stupid smartass…" a swirling vortex of malice began to radiate from the girl as she drew her katana from its sheath on her back.

"How can I be stupid if Im a smarta—"

"USUI!" Misaki smacked a hand over his mouth before he could finish, then shoved his head forward making him bow. "Please accept our apology uh, Wildcat-sama!"

"Yeah!" You-kun added. "He didn't mean it! That's just how Takumi talks—Ow! Misa-chan.." You-kun whimpered. Misaki had elbowed You-kun to shut him up, fearing he would make it worse.

"Why don't we just call it a tie and make it even? Heh heh?" Misaki twitched.

_That girl wouldn't really use that katana…..Would she?_ Then Misaki looked down at Usui and reconsidered.

"Well at least ONE of you has common sense," the girl sheathed her sword. "Your smartass friend over there owes you his measly little life!"

Misaki sighed with relief and released Usui. He stood up and brooded at Misaki while rubbing the back of his head.

"Killjoy," he complained.

"NOW! WE're listening to 'Shoot to Thrill'. Cuz that's how Tony Stark does it and that how IM gonna do it," the girl selected the AC/DC song and then had one of the Cutthroat members take the IPod.

"Just hold it and I'll be done with these guys before the song is over," she strutted toward the idiot gang, looking far more eager for a fight then she had earlier.

Shiroyan and Kurotatsu tried to quell their fears of death staring them in the face.

"Y-you only live once right?" sputtered Kurotatsu.

"Y-yeah.," Shiroyan, "guess we m-might as well go down swinging. We'll be famous for getting into a f-fight with the W-Wildcat."

"And if we beat her!" Gouki shouted with determination, "We'll be legends!"

"This is ridiculous! Why do they have to fight?!" Misaki made to walk in the middle of it and straighten them out but You-kun caught her arm.

"Misa-chan," he shook his head. "Don't interfere, please Misa-chan, it dangerous!"

"Yeah Prez, don't go spoiling the fight," Usui's eyes followed the girl. "I want to see what this Wildcat's made of…"

"_'Pull the Triggggerrrr!_'" the hooded girl sang, "SHaAAAH!" The girl kick-flipped Kurotatsu right in his face, knocking him out. Then dodged Shiroyan's attack and went head on towards two of the other boys.

"KUROTATSU!" Ikkun sobbed from the side-lines.

She punched one in the face, caught the fist of the other and then back and forth kicked both of them in their stomachs four times.

"Three down!" she announced just as Shiroyan came at her a second time. She dodged him, and then effortlessly twirled out of the way just as someone attacked from behind. She easily grabbed Gouki's arm and twisted it behind his back.

"Gouki!" Shiroyan shouted. Then the girl used Gouki as a boost to flip up and over him. Still air-born she kicked one of the guys in the face, knocking him out before she landed. Gouki came at her again, and got put in a headlock. He sputtered for air while having to keep up with the girls pace as she fought Shiroyan. She had already punched him twice: once in the nose and once in the stomach. Bloodied, Shiroyan charged her again but she shifted so that Gouki took the hit instead.

"WaTCH IT!" the kid shouted.

"Sorry!" Shiroyan retreated, trying to determine how to attack without injuring Gouki.

"Not his fault you got caught," the girl laughed and bopped Gouki on the head. Then she shoved him forward and kicked him right in the butt, sending the kid flying into Shiroyan and knocking both to the ground.

"Whoooooah! She's good!" You-kun gaped and tightened his grip around Misaki. "Stay close Misa-chan."

"You-kun, im fine!" Misaki protested, but didn't escape.

"Six down!" the girl said as she sent another man packing. Shiroyan had recovered from his fall but Gouki was still down, though he started crawling. One of the Cutthroat members saw this and smugly drew out a knife.

Shiroyan aimed a kick at the girl's side, which she side-swiped and retaliated with her own kick, sending him reeling backwards into the dirt.

"And that's the Game!" she hollered and fist pumped into the air.

_Amazing…_Misaki thought. _She subdued them all without getting hit even once…_

"Shiroyan! Kurotatsu!" Ikkun ran over to his fellow idiots.

"Just where you think you're running off to punk?" knife in hand, the man approached Gouki as he crawled away.

"Hey! Somebody stop him!" Misaki surged, but Usui put his hand up.

"Look," he said.

"Im gonna cut you up you weak little—gaAAHH!"

The girl twisted her henchmen's wrist until he dropped the knife.

"Attacking someone who's unarmed and beaten, _That_ is what I would call weak," she said to the gangster.

"Yes Miss—"

She shot him daggers with her eyes.

"I MEAN! Yes SIR!"

Gouki watched the gangsters carefully as he crept toward the knife on the ground.

"Good," she dropped the man's wrist as he winced. "We're done here then…Didn't I say I'd be done before the song ended!?" she glowed with pride.

"Your not getting away with this!" Gouki cried out as he charged at the girl with the knife.

He couldn't believe how she could defeat all of them so easily; she didn't even break a sweat! How was that possible?

"ILL BEAT YOU!"

"What is that idiot doing?!" Misaki shouted. Usui took a step forward, but then stopped.

The girl had already caught Gouki's hand with the knife and ran him up against the wall of the building.

Gouki trembled as he looked into the shadow of her face, he could barely make out her mysterious eyes.

"You have to _MEAN IT_ Harry…" ( A/N: HAHAH I couldn't resist using that quote) She twirled the blade through her fingers with swift precision. "Like THIS," and she stabbed the knife through his hand and straight into the concrete, pinning his hand to the wall.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!" Gouki screamed in pain.

"Oh hush, its not like it's gonna kill you," she patted his cheek as he squealed in pain. "I did you a favor by letting you off easy…your not left-handed are you?"

"I AM left handed!"Gouki sobbed as he tried to pull the knife out, but it was stuck.

"….oh," The girl actually looked slightly remorseful. "…my bad…."

"HOLY CRAP!" You-kun shrieked. "She STABBED HIM MISAKI! SHE REALLY DID!" he pulled her close. "We should leave before the cops get involved! What if they take us in for questioning!? What if they take us DOWN TOWN?! Granpa and Granma would kill me! WOW Ive never seen someone get stabbed! Do you think it really hurt!?"

Misaki blinked as he babbled.

"Shouldn't you be more concerned about calling an AMBULANCE YOU-KUN?"

"Huh?!" You-kun looked at her. "OH! Your right! I didn't think of that!"

"HEY," the girl called towards them. "Smartass! And you other moral support people! Make sure these guys clear outta here before midnight, cuz if I come back and they're still here," she turned back to Gouki.

"_I'll_ _finish you_," the girl hissed.

Gouki gulped.

"I suggest you take that knife out as soon as possible," she left Gouki whining over his imprisoned hand.

"Are you sure you're ok?" Ikkun said to a mangled Kurotatsu. Shiroyan had limped over to try and help Gouki get his hand free, with no luck.

"Y-yeaH…"

"Wow," Usui commented. "Your eye is all black and puffy…like a mushroom growing on your face."

"I cant believe we're just letting them leave, shouldn't they answer to the police?" Misaki said as she tried waking/smacking one of the boys up.

"How much do you know about the Cutthroats, Misaki?" Usui asked her.

"Ummm," she said dumbly, "not much besides what I heard today…"

"They are typically the type to leave no survivors, no matter what the dispute is about," Usui said, his eyes trailing back towards the girl in the hoody. "And they're known for picking up wannabe-delinquents and forcing them to fight in their tournaments for sport, so it could've ended much worse…. We were lucky she intervened."

Misaki frowned and looked over at the Cutthroats and was once again confused by the behavior of the girl who seemed to be their superior. She was yelling again.

"—this is the worst kind of exit music! I leave you in charge of my IPod for 5 minutes and at the opportunity for us to walk out of here with awesome background music, you pick Gwen Stefani's The Sweet Escape?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU! GIVE ME THAT!" she swiped the IPod out of the shaking Cutthroats hand.

Misaki noticed Usui was watching.

"Remind me to never let you be DJ again, stupid minion," she griped and started shuffling through her playlist again. "Actually, now that this song is going… I forgive you minion. Lets move out," the group started leaving as the girl—with no shame what so ever—started singing "_Wooooo-Hooooo! YEEEEEE-Hooooo!_" along with the song.

"Excuse me! Umm, Wildcat!(?)" Misaki stood and called out.

"Eh?" the girl turned around.

"Thank you," Misaki said, "for showing these idiots mercy."

The girl laughed.

"Don't thank me till you get that kid's hand free," she threw one last glare at Usui, "And you're gonna get YOURS! SMARTASS!" she shook her fist at him and then went on her way. "_WOoooo-Hooooo! YEEEEE-HOOOO_!"

And the Cutthroats left.

Shiroyan, Ikkun, You-Kun, and Misaki combined couldn't manage to pull the knife out.

"WHAT THE HELL!?" Gouki sobbed. "THAT DEMON PUT A SPELL ON THE KNIFE AND SEALED ME HERE! AND SHES GOING TO COME BACK AND CLAIM MY SOUL!"

"Don't worry Gouki," Shiroyan calmed, "We'll get you free you crybaby….USUI-SAN! _HEEELP_!"

Misaki didn't get why he hadn't been helping in the first place. He called an ambulance, which was on its way, but then he had just been hanging back and spacing out it.

Finally he sauntered over and with one hand he yanked on the blade.

But it didn't give.

Only Misaki could have recognized the surprise on his face. Then with two hands the knife finally pulled free.

Gouki collapsed on Usui's feet, crying in praise as his hand gushed. Usui just looked at the knife, and at the gash in the wall where it had been struck.

"…Wow."

To be continued…

…..

So this next chapt gets into more of the funny/complicated stuff and closer look at Saya/the Wildcat. She gets an outrageous order from her father to "accommodate" a certain pervert. Apron goes on and gloves come off…translation: she has a melt down. HEHEHEHEHEHEHE!

**Next Chapter**: _I WANT MY PANTS BACK!_


	2. Chapter 2: I Want My Pants BAck!

**The following contains: a dangerously sexy alien (side-effects may result in nosebleeds), violence, a made-up representation of gangs, inappropriate language, embarrassing and awkward situations, feats of inhuman/unrealistic strength, speed, and mutant powers that cannot be achieved in real life (sadly) and should not be attempted unless you are an actual alien or mutant. DISCLAIMER: original Kaichou-Wa Maid-Sama manga and all rights belong to Hiro Fujiwara, who is awesome.**

**~o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o~**

Saya watched from her position on the left flank of her father's desk as the tall, trim guy with bleached-blonde hair entered the room. She immediately picked up on his arrogance by his high and mighty expression. A squinty-eyed guy with dark hair followed closely after.

_ Man, what's with all these nancy boys I keep seeing today?_

The Smartass guy from earlier was still fresh in her mind. She kept reminding herself that she needed to go back and check to see if that whiny kid actually gotten the knife out of his hand.

"I wasn't expecting the Igarashi's to send a boy to do a man's job," the Boss greeted the highschooler stiffly.

The bleach-blonde smirked, casually took off his jacket and threw it to the dark haired boy before taking a seat in front of the desk.

"If I wasn't capable of dealing with scum my father wouldn't have sent me," the rich boy said haughtily.

Saya lunged forward at the insult, but her father raised his hand and she halted immediately.

"Loyal dog you've got there," the rich boy grinned smugly. "But lets get down to business, shall we? I believe you owe the Igarashi family an apology, Mr. Minatsuki, and we expect you to fully compensate us for your mistake…" he was letting his threat sink in.

Saya twitched and waited for her father to put the brat in his place.

"What are your terms?" said the Boss.

"WHAT!" Saya erupted from her position near her father's desk. "You're NEGOTATING with this _NINNY?!_"

"DID I ASK FOR YOUR OPINION?" the Boss's voice thundered at his daughter.

She couldn't believe that her own father was letting himself get bullied by a spoiled punk. She didn't know the details of the situation, she had barely gotten back when the meeting had started, but she was most thrilled to learn that it had been all Taizo's fault.

Taizo, her father's numero uno right hand man, was literally a shiver looking for a spine to run up, and that spine always happened to be Saya's. He was a total creepy-sneaky-cutthroat-psycho and she hated him.

Apparently Taizo had screwed up big time in a shipment with the Igarashi family. Saya didn't care how rich this kid was or how many connections his family had. Who the hell was he to think he could challenge the Cutthroats?

"You're acting like push-over!" Saya said to her father.

"HOLD YOUR TONGUE!" the Boss ordered his daughter.

"Well well, I didn't realize there was a lady present." the rich boy cut in. "Where are my manners?" he rose out of his chair. "Not a dog then…."

Her fingers itched to form a fist as he strode toward her. "Actually, Im a female impersonator," she replied curtly.

"Really?" the rich boy chuckled. "I could hardly tell with you hiding under that jacket…Take off your hood and let me see your face," the rich boy commanded.

"Well aren't _you_ a waste of two billion years of evolution," Saya replied. "You must be an idiot if you think I'm gonna take orders from you."

Taizo snickered from the other side of the room.

"Saya," her father silenced both of them with his tone. "You will show our guest respect by removing your hood."

Despite her instincts, she took down her hood, exposing her face and her dark reddish brown hair.

The bleach-blonde smirked as he looked her over….and that was when she noticed his teeth.

_Snaggletooth…_she thought.

"What a waste for you to dress yourself like that…" he took her hand.

Her eyes flickered to her father for instruction, but he let the rich boy do as he pleased.

Saya blinked when the rich boy bowed and suddenly kissed her hand.

"Allow me to introduce myself again," he said politely. "Im the President of the Miyabigaoka Student council, Igarashi Tora," he flashed his teeth at her again, "but you can call me Tiger-kun, Wildcat." He winked.

_ …This guy is depriving some poor village of its Idiot._

"She's right though," Tora went back to his seat. "A Mob Boss should have more backbone then that, more like your Wildcat…." The rich boy stared at Saya.

"…Then again I suppose that shows how highly you regard my family name," he continued. "So I am willing to cut you a different deal than what my father had in mind, out of mutual respect."

"The terms?" The Boss asked for the second time.

"Give me your Wildcat and all shall be forgiven."

X…..X*

_THAT SON-OF-A-LECHER! PSssh…_She tried to calm herself. _My father would never agre—_

"Deal."

The two shook on it.

"hORSE'sASS!" Saya cursed and kicked a lamp off the desk, hitting one of the Cutthroat members in the face. "AHOOOW! GAwD wHYYY?!" the random Cutthroat wailed.

Tora laughed at the display, his mind churning of the amusement he would get out of his new toy.

"SAYA," he father roared and stood to his full height. Saya froze. "I will have a word with you before you go."

"Very well," Tora eyed Saya as he and the dark-haired boy left the room. "I'll be waiting, Wildcat. Let's go Maki." Taizo's eyes burned into the back of the rich boys head as he exited along with everyone else.

"You cant be serious?!" Saya rang in outburst as soon as the room was clear.

"I expect you to hold up our end of the bargain—"

"No!"

"A Deal is a DEAL," her father answered coldly, "and I wont have my organization dishonored because of your insubordination."

"Taizo is the one who couldn't follow orders! Why am I being punished for it!?"

"He is being punished," the Boss said lightly, "I've just stripped him of his chances for an engagement, I cant imagine anyone being more outraged with Igarashi's terms."

_ I can imagine someone who might be just a LITTLE more upset…three guess's who! Oh and its DEFINETELY **NOT** me. _V_V

"So you WERE planning to set me up with that CREEP?!" Saya scoffed. She had always suspected as much. "How can you just auction me off like that!?"

"YOU'RE _MY_ DAUGHTER!" her father blared and glared at her with disdain. "Since I no longer have a male heir for this organization, I will use you how I see fit and if that means renting you out to each and every interested party, then it will be done."

He lit a cigar.

Saya felt a stinging sensation in her chest as her hatred festered. She hated when he brought up Seito, her dead big brother.

"Im the best fighter you've got," Saya protested.

"You are also a girl," her father sneered at her. "It's time you started acting like one."

"You need me—"

"_Taizo_ is all the muscle I need. _Igarashi_ is the connection I need. And _you_ are what he wants." He blew a smoke ring around her face. "You're Wildcat days are over Saya…Your duty to this organization is now to obey each and every whim of that boy, with _no_ hesitation. Am I clear?"

Saya averted her eyes to the floor.

"How long am I suppose to stay with him?" she waited for a hopeful answer.

"Until he's satisfied," he puffed.

_ OR UNTIL I STRANLGE THAT RICH BASTARD WITH HIS OWN HAIR-DRYER!_

"We're lucky he asked for so little," the Boss chuckled, "the fool…Now get out."

Saya frowned and headed towards the door.

"Leave the sword."

Her nostrils flared as she unwillingly yanked her katana off her back and threw it at his desk.

"FINE! TAKE IT!" She turned on her heel and stormed out the doors, then kicked them shut. "I DON'T BELIEVE THIS SH*T!"

Then she threw the doors open again, and slammed them shut. Then she opened them again, "YOU'RE HORRIBLE!" she shouted at her father, and then slammed them shut again….and one more time for good measure, just like on "Superstar".

"HOO_RRIBLLLEE!_" she slammed it shut and kicked the doors repeatedly. She blew a mess of hair out of her face and flipped her hood back up. With any luck her tantrum would get her shot dead while she still had some dignity.

"…set the building on fire…no good sons-a-b*tches…" she mumbled to herself.

"Quite the spectacle," Tora said, having watched the whole thing. "But making a fuss isn't going to change the fact that you belong to me now."

"You know," Saya faced the rich boy and his butt-monkey, "Some people are _ONLY_ alive because it's illegal to shoot them."

Tora's teeth flashed darkly as he cackled.

"Man…" he wiped his chin with his wrist, "you are just way to interesting. But as much as I enjoy your cheeky remarks…" He tilted his head as he stared her down. "Is that anyway to speak to your Master?"

Saya really…Reallly wished she still had her sword.

"Now apologize," Tora smirked, "and beg your Master's forgiveness. Go on, I want to hear it, 'Forgive me Master'." He was having way too much fun.

_ This…stupid. Egotistical. PRICK. _But she knew that he had a point, she was going to have to bite her tongue for the next…she tried not to think about just how long she'd be stuck as his pet.

"Im sorry…I just didn't know we were reverting back to such formal terms, _Tiger-kun_," she said in her most polite tone. She couldn't help but mock him one last time.

"Don't worry," Tora walked over and took her hood back down, "you can use that once we've gotten better acquainted with each other, Saya-chan." He grinned suggestively as he unzipped her jacket.

Saya turned stony-faced in order to keep herself from lashing out at him.

"Oh my," he examined her chest, "these clothes really do nothing for your figure…"

_ I love my David Bowie t-shirt! _Saya thought offensively.

"Maki," he called.

"Yes President?" the squinted-eyed guy was at his side.

"Get Saya-chan set up with a more suitable wardrobe."

"Yes Sir."

"Well?" Tora waited for a reaction from her. "I just bought you a present, what do you say?"

V…V

"Thank you…Master," she bowed, though ever fiber of her being was crying out for rebellion. But for now she knew she had play the servant…until she could come up with a strategy to turn the tables…

~o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o~

_NO WAY IN HELL!_ Saya was paralyzed with humiliation at the "uniform" that was presented to her.

"That one's…a little… revealing, Master," she twitched.

If only she still had her katana.

Tora held the hanger with the garment on it in front of her, getting an idea of how in might look.

"That's what I like about it. Don't you?" he goaded.

_YOURE MOTHER SHOULD HAVE SENT YOU BACK AND KEPT THE STORK! _

Saya's mind was overflowing with insults, but she let none of her frustration show.

"Get her dressed and make any alterations needed," Tora ordered before Saya could answer.

"Come along miss," two women escorted/dragged Saya into a changing room and began measuring and picking at her, evaluating her size for the outfit.

_ I cant believe he has this kind of space in his house_, Saya thought to herself, trying to block out how the women were forcing her to undress and put on the skimpy frock.

As soon as they had arrived at the Igarashi residence, aka MANSION, Maki the Butt-Wipe had had the two servant women waiting for them, along with all the new clothes. All of which of course, were MAID outfits. Saya had nearly forced herself to puke as means of delaying her having to put on any of the revolting uniforms.

"Oh dear…" one of the servants said shockingly, examining the scarred gashes that ran down the left side of her back and around to the side of her hip. "May I ask what happened?"

"Knife fight," Saya shrugged. It was an old wound and the least of her worries at the moment.

The two women gave each other a perplexed look and went back to their task.

"Just bring her out already," Tora groaned with boredom as he waited on the sofa outside where Saya was changing.

Saya looked at herself in the mirror as the women finished lacing up her back.

_I cant breathe in this thing!_ _ And EVERYTHING is WAY TO TIGHT! If I go out there like this, he'll…he'll see…STUFF! _ Saya wasn't fat, but she did have some extra meat on her, among other things….

The maid outfit was completely strapless, and the corset boosted her already round curves. And the skirt of the dress…well..

_This thing is like HEADBAND FOR MY ASS!_ It was hardly a skirt at all.

"It fits perfectly!" the two women finished. Saya looked at them and realized they were agents of debauchery. She raced to the door before they could get their hands on her again.

"Can't I try on a different one, Master?" Saya pleaded and peeked her head around the door, PRAYING that he would show mercy.

Tora's eyes were mesmerized by her bare shoulder that was sticking out as she hung behind the door. Her arms were toned and appealing and he wanted to see more.

Saya took one look at his greedy eyes and knew she had found a strategy. It was a desperate move, but no other alternative was coming to mind.

"It's no fun when you don't leave a little mystery…" she said shyly in her best attempt at being deviously innocent, "…right Master?" she pouted sweetly.

Tora's throat went dry.

"…Fine," he gave in and got up to pick out a second maid outfit.

_AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAH! IT WORKED! It worked? _

Saya had always thought all methods of persuasion revolved around beating the crap out of someone, but she had clearly been mistaken. Still, now that she had discovered this new method…how was she supposed to use it again…?  
"This is your only other option," Tora approached the door with the new outfit.

Saya analyzed it. It had some sort of spaghetti straps but it wasn't as low-cut and the skirt was almost knee-length.

"How generous," She forced a gracious smile. "Thank you, Master." She snatched it out of his hand as quickly as she could and slammed the door in his face just as he had started to peer around the door. "Dont want to keep you waiting!" she called, excusing her hasty behavior.

"Hurry up then," Tora said impatiently, running a hand through his spiky hair.

"Yes Master!" she confirmed with false eagerness, she was in such a panic on the inside that she had practically forgotten her anger.

She had never worn a dress in her adult life. She used to have one she absolutely ADORDED when she was little, but that was a secret she would take to her grave.

This experience was going to haunt her forever. She was pretty sure she was developing another fear in addition to her aqua-phobia. A new fear of all things frilly, feminine, lacey, or without pants. Anything maid related was officially her new nightmare.

_And I shall call it: Le FrouFrou-Phobia._

She took a deep breath and collected herself as she stepped out of the changing room. The two women pushed her forward, proud of their handiwork.

Tora raised an eyebrow as he mulled her over.

"That'll do…you should be able to fulfill your house-hold chores very well in that" he lifted her chin and smirked as she tensed, "but I would like to see something done with her hair…"

Saya mentally pictured herself kneeing Tora in the crotch…several times….

It didn't help…much.

The only thing she ever did with her hair was braid it and nobody, NOBODY had ever been allowed to touch it.

Saya followed the rich boy down a corridor. She was having a bit of trouble keeping up with him due to her never-learned-to-walk-in-heels complex. Her scalp felt unfamiliarly uncomfortable with her hair done up in some swirly bun.

_I should have been born a boy._

Tora stopped at one of the doors.

"This is where you'll sleep," he explained and held the door open.

She looked at him cautiously.

_I sense a trap._

"Go on," he urged her inside.

It was a gigantic, elegant and positively pampered room.

Saya was shocked.

"…well this isn't what I expected…I mean—" she closed her eyes in frustration, reminding herself to shut up, "It's very impressive Master, thank you."

"What _were_ you expecting?" Tora flashed a sharp-toothed smile at her. "And I want to hear the uncensored version," he smirked.

"I don't know.." Saya said awkwardly, "a cage or something…?"

"A cage!" Tora laughed at her honesty. "Now there's an idea…" Tora thought this woman had the most amusing thought-process.

Saya grew uneasy as he shut the door.

"In fact, its growing on me," he walked towards her. "I could keep you locked away all for myself…."

She cursed inwardly; if she tried backing away from him it would only bring her closer to the bed.

_If there is ANY, _**ANY**_ justice in this world, PLEEEEASE let him get struck down with menstrual cramps! _Then Saya realized…

_ That's it!_

Hope swelled inside of her now that she knew she had an ace up her sleeve.

"I'd like to know," Tora invaded her personal space. He leaned in closer. "Just how wild _is_ the Wildcat?"

"Master," Saya held her composure. "I don't think this is a good idea…"

"I'll do as I please, Saya-chan," he mocked her and grabbed her wrist. "Now lie down."

"C-cant this wait for another time Master? We've only just met," she stalled.

"All the more reason to get to know each other," Tora hissed in her ear.

"Master…I really…cant," she tried to suppress a shudder as she felt his breath upon her.

"I think your Master will be the one making that call," he said darkly and narrowed in on her mouth.

"IM ON MY MONTHLY!"

Tora froze, caught completely off guard.

"My apologies Master," she bowed, "I shouldn't burden you with such details."

_HEHEHEHEHEHEH! I AM **A GENIUS**!_

"But you see Master, as much as I wish I could turn off my ovaries, they just keep—"

"I get it," Tora pinched the bridge of his nose, nauseated.

"We could still try I suppose, if that's what you want—"

"NO," he cut her off, backing away. "No no …We'll just.. pick up where we left off some other time…." He walked towards the door, thwarted.

_ That's right fool! Back up! _

"Oh, um…Master," Saya said shyly, "Do..do you have any extra tampons laying around? Because I didn't bring that many with me, and my flow is _really_ heavy—"

"GaAHA-NOo!" He cut her off and covered his ears.

"I don't know how much longer this one is gonna last—"

"Maki!" he yelled out the door. "Get in here! Quick! and ..and deal with this!"

"Oh good, can you make sure he gets the super-absorbent kind, extra large?"

"MAKI! NOW!"

"Thank you Master!" Saya waved and congratulated herself as Tora slammed the door shut.

Saya didn't sleep very well that night. In addition to her personal anguish something else was bothering her. She kept thinking she had forgotten something…

~o0o0o0o0o0o~

Usui trailed towards the parking lot and scanned the scene.

It was vacant.

He glanced at his watch. Midnight.

Looks like the Wildcat hadn't meant it when she said she'd be back.

Usui sighed.

_I suppose it was worth a try, _he thought to himself, though he was quite put out.

He had been looking forward to another song-title duel.

A few days later Usui was surprised to see he had something in the mail from the Student Council President of Miyabigaoka.

"…Invites President Ayuzawa and Usui Takumi to dinner at the Igarashi residence…"Usui skimmed as he read to himself. "…Tomorrow night… awaiting your favorable reply…hmmm…" He wondered what the pervy-bro had in store.

Whatever it was, Usui was game.

He'd make sure Misaki RSVP'd.

To be continued…

….

OOOOOOO! FORESHADOWING! How will the encounter between Saya and Usui turn out? And whats this that Tora is celebrating? FIND OUT! I kinda felt like this is a bit of a rough start to me, but this next part im REALLLY excited about. VENGENCE WILL BE HAD!

**Next Chapter: **_Kiss my SHOE!_


	3. Chapter 3: Kiss My Shoe

**The following contains: a dangerously sexy alien (side-effects may result in nosebleeds), violence, a made-up representation of gangs, inappropriate language, embarrassing and awkward situations, feats of inhuman/unrealistic strength, speed, and mutant powers that cannot be achieved in real life (sadly) and should not be attempted unless you are an actual alien or mutant. And yes this is an Usui x OC alternate Universe.**

**DISCLAIMER: original manga and all rights belong to ****Hiro Fujiwara****, who is awesome.**

~o0o0o0o0o0o0o~

It had been less than a week of lacey-straight-jacket hell and Saya was already on the verge of manslaughter. She didn't mind cleaning, but doing it in someone else's house and in a skirt that constantly gave you a wedgie…that was just a bit too much, and so was demanding that she dress her "Master" when he came fresh out of the shower (Saya honestly had no idea how she had managed to talk her way out of that one).

She shuddered at the memory as she cleaned the kitchen.

The fork next to the toaster was starting to look reaaaaal friendly.

Especially since Tora had said they were having guests over tonight. Also, her "grace period" for keeping the rich boy at an arms length was running out.

Saya grumbled to herself and went back to polishing the stove. At least she got a break from the rich bastard while he was at school.

"Ohhh look at that SpArkLE!" Saya nearly ruined the product of her elbow grease as she salivated over the glorious kitchen. As much as she was against girly things, sparkly stuff was one of her weaknesses…so were British guys *drool*.

And kitchens. She had always dreamed of being an Iron Chief, but her obligations as a gangster had obviously cast that aside.

Saya hustled to finish and start on the other floors. The rich boy would be back soon and the house was supposed to be spick-and-span by the time the guests arrived.

Thank the Lord they hadn't taken away her IPod.

~o0o0o0o0o0o0o~

Usui pressed the doorbell and waited with Misaki.

"Are you sure the invitation said 5:00? I could've sworn it said 7:00…" Misaki scratched her head.

"It said 7."

"Then why did you have us come so early!?" Misaki exclaimed, angry that he had tricked her.

"I thought that the sooner we got here the sooner we could leave," Usui answered. "Or did you actually want to stay?"

"Oh…" Misaki blinked, "no…good idea…" Misaki hadn't really wanted to come, but as Seika's Student Council President, she thought it would be impolite to decline Igarashi's invitation.

The door opened.

"President Ayuzawa, Usui-san, we weren't expecting you so early."

"Maki? I mean, Vice President," Misaki gawked.

"I guess he really is a butler…" Usui commented.

"Please come in," Maki gestured as he bowed and held the door open, "I will inform President Igarashi of your arrival."

Maki seemed to disappear almost as soon the two walked through the door.

"…Whoa," Misaki looked around at the exterior of the house. "It's so…expensive…and _clean_. REALLY clean." Everything was arranged, furbished, and polished to perfection.

"Look at the chandelier," Usui pointed in awe, "it's almost blinding."

"You're right," Misaki had to shield her eyes from the glow.

"Being punctual is a good quality, but showing up _this _early is what most people would call rude." Igarashi Tora entered threshold from one of the spacious hallways, Maki at his side. "You've caught me unprepared."

"It doesn't look like it…" Misaki muttered, her definition of the word "tidy" completely blow away. "This is just insane."

"Sorry for the surprise," Usui said dully, "We were just looking forward to dinner so much that we couldn't wait."

"Is that so?" Tora replied doubtfully.

"How did they even get up so high to polish that?...huh?" Misaki finally tuned in.

"Impressed?" Tora caught her attention. "To be honest I was surprised that my new housekeeper had such…natural talent." Tora smirked. "She's the real deal," he looked at Misaki, "my own personal maid."

Misaki frowned at him.

"Would you like to meet her? You might be able to learn something," he cracked a sharp-toothed smile. Tora was still very interested in Misaki.

"Excuse me President Igarashi, but I would rather you tell us why you've invited us here," Misaki said flatly. "What business do you have with us?"

"So formal," Tora chuckled, "Don't worry, we'll get to that later. But first I want you to meet her. After all, she has a part to play in what I've got to offer you…."

Misaki and Usui followed him down the hall.

"Have you ever heard of the Cutthroat Showdown Gang?" he asked, his back to them as he walked.

Usui's ears perked up.

"Yeah," Misaki answered, confused by the off topic. "We actually had a bit of a run-in with some of them not to long ago."

"We saw the Wildcat stab a guy," Usui elaborated.

"Really?" Tora turned to them. "HAhahah! She stabbed someone?!"

"Why do you make it sound like that's a good thing?" Misaki squinted at him.

"That woman…" Tora laughed to himself.

"You know her?" Usui was calculating. He could hear a voice coming from the direction they were headed. Someone was singing…well, sort of singing.

"Oh yeah, we've gotten very close very recently," Tora replied with a grin. "this'll make things all the more interesting for everyone…"

_"…And I'd be dancin' with myse-elf. Oh O-ohh. _

_Dancin' with myse-ellf,"_

Saya mumbled along as she finished up in the dining room.

She had her headphones pretty loud, but she still thought she heard the rich boy calling her.

She ignored it.

If she pretended not to hear him, maybe he'd go away. Plus, it was her favorite part of the Billy Idol song.

_"…And I'll sweat, sweat, sweat…"_

"Saya," Tora barked for the third time. "Im _talking _to you!"

Misaki grimaced at how he treated the maid, she was neck deep in sympathy for the poor girl and glad that it seemed like she couldn't hear him.

The dancing and the IPod was a dead give-away to Usui, but it was still a shock to think that the Wildcat and this maid were the same person. He smiled at her idiotic dancing as she sang, and took in every possible detail of the way her shoulders and hips swayed.

_ "Sweat, sweat, Sweat! Sweat Sweat! Ahhh-ahhOOW!_" She threw her head back as she sang, and then went back to sweeping as she bobbed her head.

"_ Ah dancing with myse-eellf, Uh Uh oh—"_

A headphone was yanked out of her ear.

Saya turned in surprise, pretending to have never noticed his arrival.

_CANT YOU SEE IM'A DANCIN WITH MYSELF HERE!? V_V_

"Oh, sorry Master. Did you call for me?" she said on the outside. It was then that Saya realized they weren't the only people in the room.

_…..Fuuudddgggggeee…._

Saya recognized the boy immediately, there was no way she could have forgotten those all-seeing green eyes. And she recognized the girl as well.

_ …Well, There goes my reputation as a badass….Wait! _she reminded herself that all was not lost. _I had my hood up that time, so they didn't see my face! THEY'LL NEVER KNOW IT WAS ME!_

"Our guests are here early, Saya-chan. And though they tell me you've already met, I still expect you to be on your best behavior," Tora wore a superior expression as he grinned.

_GOD #$^&*%^^ *#& #%!$^%&* DAMMIT! #$%*#^Q#$%& HE TOLD THEM WHO I AM!?_

Saya pictured herself hanging at the gallows.

"Wait," Misaki said, just catching on, "are you saying….thats the Wildcat?"

"You're slow Prez," Usui said.

G_uess there's no hiding it now..._she thought miserably._ Oh well..in the mean time, I have a score to settle…_

Saya flashed a poised smile and turned to the boy and girl.

"'Welcome to the Jungle', my name is Saya" she bowed, "At your service." She made eye contact with the boy, and judging by his smartass look, he had caught on.

Tora and Misaki both blinked at the odd greeting.

"Jungle?" Tora questioned what the meaning behind that was.

Saya nodded.

"It's inhabited by wild tigers and cats," Saya explained and Tora smirked.

"Good thing Im not intimidated by jungle cats," Usui was keen on winning their on-going battle. "If I ever came across one Id just charm it with a little 'Sugar, Sugar'."

Misaki face-palmed herself. _Not this again…._

Saya had to stifle a snort.

"I wasn't trying to intimidate you, Sir," she said cooly. "If I had been, I would've greeted you with something like 'Someone's Gonna Get Their Head Kicked in Tonight'."

"HhAHhaha! Saya," Tora sighed, "I shouldn't allow you to misbehave like that, but in this case …" Tora was rather pleased. "You don't like this guy very much do you Wildcat?"

_Sounds to me like YOU don't like him very much_, Saya observed.

"She likes me more than she likes _you_, pervy bro," Usui said.

She could barely hold it in that time, Saya cleared her throat to keep from laughing out loud.

_AAHAHAH! Pervy Bro? BRO?EWW! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! _

But Tora had noticed her slip up, so she had to cover herself. She coughed and addressed the smartass.

"Usui-san right?"

Usui's eyes flickered to Saya at her use of his name.

"I don't mean to be rude, but you'd be mistaken if you were to think I held you in higher regard than my Master," Saya looked him straight in the eye; it was the most convincing lie she'd ever told.

Usui raised an eyebrow.

Tora smiled wildly, relishing the way Usui was being labeled inferior.

"So you _don't_ like him Saya-chan?"

"He is barely tolerable, Master."

Usui smirked.

"Tell me," Tora was eager for a response, "what would you do if I lifted your combat restrictions and let you do as you pleased with him?" He could just imagine Saya beating and making a fool out of the high and mighty Usui.

"Hey!" Misaki protested, "Don't joke about that kind of thing!"

"Uh…" Saya thought. If she did anything to that guy it'd probably be break his nose… then maybe he wouldn't be so distracting to look at. "Master Im not sure that would be appropriate…"

"Leave it to the pervy bro to ask such a question," Usui said lightly. "You shouldn't put her on the spot like that."

"What are you talking about Usui?" Misaki forehead creased.

"It's bad manners to ask her to disclose dirty details of how she would have her way with me."

"USUI! Are you retarded!?"

"What?" he blinked at Misaki, and then looked at Saya, who was staring at him with a face like thunder. "You wouldn't kiss and tell, would you?"

Saya twitched._ What is WITH this guy!? _

"Watch how you talk to my fiancé, Usui."

Saya snapped her head in Tora's direction, her mind going blank.

"Fiancé?" Misaki's eyebrows rose.

Usui stared.

"Excuse me? _Master_?" Saya's bent up rage was reaching its limits.

_Oh HELL no. Ive cleaned this guy's toilet LONG ENOUGH! If this is true, IT WILL MEAN WAR._

"Yeah, I guess I should've told you sooner," Tora was enjoying himself. He could see the fury hidden beneath Saya's polite composure, "but I thought it would be more interesting to surprise you…"

_Well CON-GRATS! I AM **utterly** stunned._ The vein in her forehead was about to burst at any minute.

"You're father was delighted with the proposal. He thought it would be beneficial on both our sides."

"If you wouldn't mind Master, I'd like to get a confirmation from my Father."

Tora scoffed.

"You don't believe me?"

"On the contrary, I have no doubt my father would agree to this, but I would still like to hear it from him."

Misaki couldn't help noticing the aura of hostility that was starting to accumulate.

"Fine," he pulled out his cellphone and called a number. With a condescending look, he handed it to Saya.

_Got my dad's number in your contacts huh? Aren't you two just CHUMMY?_

"Thank you, Master," she took the phone and left the room.

Tora turned to Misaki and Usui.

"Please, sit." He pulled out a chair for Misaki.

~  
"_Igarashi_?" her father's voice answered roughly.

"Actually its "Soon-to-be" Igarashi," Saya clarified, her temper rising. "But of course, no one told ME that."

"_Did you really not see this coming Saya_?"

"No!" Saya shook her head reverently. She really, really had never thought he dad could be THAT much of a jerk. "I was counting on you to get me out of this frou-frou hell!"

"_You should be grateful that a boy like that is even interested in you. He's of a noble line with money, power—_"

"Well if he's SOOOO great, **WHY DON'T _YOU_ MARRY HIM?**!"

Usui and Misaki choked on their tea, hearing Saya's outburst from the other room. Misaki's hand flew over her mouth to stop her from laughing. She definitely understood Saya's revulsion with the arranged marriage.

Usui looked at Tora.

"Sounds like she doesn't like you either." :]

Saya snapped the phone shut.

_That. Is. It. _

Who cares if her father was gonna disowned her if she didn't marry that sissy boy?! She sure as hell didn't!

_Since he wont see reason, I'm just gonna have to take things into my own hands._

Saya snickered to herself, a plot to reap her revenge already brewing…

"President Igarashi," Misaki hesitated, "are you sure its okay for us to be here? Shouldn't this be a more private, uh…discussion between you and Saya?"

"A discussion would be implying that there is something to talk about, President Ayuzawa," Saya re-entered the room, "which there isn't. This is a celebration. And what's a celebration without an audience, right Master?" Saya smiled brightly.

Tora was shocked. It was the first real smile he had ever seen her wear.

"Exactly…" Tora answered. "Dinner is always better with a show."

"I couldn't agree more," she inclined her head gracefully.

Usui watched as he drank his tea, pondering Saya's sudden switch in temperament.

"So, with this being a special occasion, I have a request, Master."

Tora cocked an eyebrow.

"Please do me the honor of letting me prepare dinner for tonight," Saya bowed.

"You cook?" Tora and Usui said in unison.

"You underestimate me, Master," Saya tilted her head up and gave Tora a look that made his mouth water. "I promise you, it will be a feast to remember."

"Alright," Tora conceded, "but make it quick, Im already hungry." Tora's eyes shifted from Saya to Misaki.

"With pleasure," Saya smiled sweetly and bowed again before sweeping out of the room.

_Muwahahaha! AAHAHAHAHAMUWAHAHAHAHAHAHHHH! _

"Magnificent, isn't she?" Tora gloated. "That's what I call a woman…Clever, independent, strong-willed, _and_ she knows how to play the game…" Tora smirked at Misaki.

"What game?" Misaki said in annoyance.

"Poker," Usui said.

"She definitely knows how to play her cards right…You on the other hand," Tora sighed at Misaki, "…I can call your bluff."

But that was thing about Misaki that rattled him; her intentions were always so straightforward, flat out obvious even. He SHOULD have been able to call her bluff, yet her simple honesty always threw him through a loop.

"Arent we getting off topic, _President_ Igarashi?" Misaki glared.

"Eh alright, I suppose we should get down to business before we enjoy the rest of our evening…"

~o0o0o0o0o0o~

Saya made her way to the kitchen, the head chef and his crew were already starting on the menu.

"Listen up, all of you!" she called their attention. "There's been a change in plans. I will be making dinner, so clear out."

"U-uh M-miss Saya," the head chef gave a nervous bow.

Saya twitched.

"I d-don't mean to over step my place b-but, I don't think y-your allowed near the k-knives—"

"FOOL!" Saya snapped. "Is that anyway to talk to your future Mistress? YOU DARE QUESTION TORA'S FIANCE!?"

"FOR THE LOVE OF SUSHI NO!" the chef squeaked. "_EVACUATE!"_ he cried and dashed out the door.

"CHEF!" the rest followed at top speed.

"Excellent…" Saya evilly drummed her fingers together. She inhaled the scent of the superb kitchen and smiled.

It had always been Saya's job to prepare meals for her father's guest during evening meetings. Well, it actually wasn't her job… but Saya would always kick people out of the kitchen anyway and make it her job. And she was good at it. She loved baking and cooking (and eating), it was one of the few things she was actually proud to show-off.

Saya took the stupid ruffle thing off of her head and replaced it with a bandana, tightening it snug.

A_nd now_… Saya drew up her inner chi.

"ALLEZ CUISINE!"

~o0o0o0o0o0o~

"…I'll be becoming the head of the Cutthroat Showdown Gang," Tora was explaining, "and I intend to increase its number of members. Which is where you come in," Tora's eyes glazed over Misaki.

"I want you to start a club at Seika High, a precursor to becoming a Cutthroat."

"You mean you want me to recruit students to participate in illegal activities?" Misaki seethed.

"More or less," Tora waved his hand idly.

"Well I wont do it," Misaki said firmly. "I wont be responsible for enlisting students in a life of crime."

"Oh c'mon," Tora scoffed. "Half of your student body is already on their way to getting convicted, so why not make sure they're at least getting paid for it?"

Misaki was appalled.

"You're their President, you're suppose to be looking out for them. And what better way to do it than setting them up for a future career where they can be free to act like the delinquents they are?"

Usui took another sip of his tea.

"It would be your job, President Ayuzawa and Usui, to train them. Meanwhile at Miyabigaoka, Saya will be in charge of the new recruits there." Tora went on. "You're students respect both of you, I couldn't imagine better leaders to discipline those peasants… And I'll have created the mightiest generation of Cutthroat gangsters," he flashed his teeth maliciously.

"Is that all?" Misaki crossed her arms.

"..hmmm..empty…" Usui poked at his teacup.

"Your efforts would be handsomely rewarded. If you proved yourself, I would be willing to re-establish the scholarship I had offered you and your sister…President Ayuzawa."

Misaki was lost for words.

"How come Misa-chan is the only one getting a VIP scholarship?" Usui interrupted.

Tora threw Usui an aggravated look and was about to respond—.

"Excuse me, Master."

Saya entered the dinning room pushing a cart loaded with delicate bowls and steaming pots of food.

"Dinner is served." Normally she would be serving a dinner like this from behind a counter where she could store all the final touches that needed to be individually added throughout the meal, but she was going to have to make due with the cart.

"That was fast," Tora remarked.

_Thats cuz I went Super Saiyan in the kitchen._

"Whoa!" Misaki was blown away. "It..it all looks so fancy!"

"It's Kaiseki," Usui said, analyzing the food. "Traditionally a multi-course dinner, very high class. A kaiseki dinner at a restaurant can cost anything from 15,000 to 40,000 yen per person."

(A/N: I did some research and I guess it really IS that fancy! SOUNDS SO COOL!)

"40,000 YEN?!" Misaki had no idea. "…how do you even know that Usui?"

"Why wouldn't I know that?"

"It looks like you didn't make all 14 courses though," Tora said with a pompous air.

"My apologies Master, I only had time to make 8," Saya said as she began dishing out the appetizer. "I assumed that you would rather not be kept waiting and stuck to the most important dishes."

_Boy you are LUCKY you are even getting to LOOK at this masterpiece!...before I KILL YOU!_

"I expected better," he said cynically.

"Quality over quantity, pervy bro," Usui said before Saya could even respond.

She blinked.

_Did he just defend me?_

"Thank you for the food!" Misaki chimed and enthusiastically dug in to the seafood dish.

Saya smiled. No one had ever really given her credit for her cooking before. But the next course was when the REAL fireworks were gonna take off.

She watched patiently as Tora took a bite of the sashimi and ponzu. The Ponzu was the key. In the appetizer it was the white miso marinate that contained her "special" ingredient just for the rich bastard. It would hit him soon.

And if it didn't, there was always the egg yolk sauce in the third course.

"You served the ponzu as jelly instead of a dipping sauce…" Usui chewed his food slowly. (A/N: I read that chilled ponzu jelly "reaches another gastronomic dimension".)

Saya briefly took her attention away from her target.

"Is that a problem?" Her question came out rather cold because she was getting antsy, but also because Usui's knowledge of food was starting to intimidate her.

"Not at all," Usui locked eyes with her, "my compliments."

If Saya didn't know any better, she'd say he almost made her blush.

"But the texture of the fish was a touch to firm for my taste."

V_V** Saya was insulted.

_Then that would be the FISH'S FAULT! _she wanted to say.

"Shut up Usui!" Misaki butted in. "Don't mind him, he's just a stupid alien. He doesn't know what he's talking about. It's delicious!"

"…Thank you," Saya bowed.

"Yeah..."

Saya looked over at the sound of the rich boy's voice and saw his plate was scrapped clean.

She bit back a smirk.

_Any minute now._

"I have to admit that was better than anything my kitchen staff has ever made for me," Tora grinned. "Now, get me the next dish."

"Yes, Master."

Saya was placing the 3rd course in front of him when she heard it.

A low, guttural rumble.

Tora swallowed and put his hand to his stomach.

"Master," she wore her 'concerned' expression, "are you feeling well?"

A cold sweat broke across Tora's face as his innards gurgled.

"…my stomach…" He did **not** feel well.

"Ohh…" Saya leaned forward, putting her hand on his shoulder, "…Maybe it was something you ate," she whispered in his ear.

Tora glowered in dread as a wicked smile broke across Saya's face.

"..you.. you Poisoned Me!"

Usui and Misaki froze in mid bite. They both slowly looked down at their own food.

"ANARCHY IN THE U.K.!" Saya bellowed and punched him right in his face.

Tora reeled sideways and was knocked out of his chair, gasping in pain.

Usui held up a scorecard with '8.5' on it.

"Aren't you supposed to be good at judo or something?" Saya looked down on Tora.

"You damn—" he was about to get back up but then he felt like his rear-end was gonna burst. "uuhg-gAAAHHHHhh!"

Usui and Misaki watched, dumbstruck, as Tora scrambled to his feet.

"t-TOILET!" he shouted without thinking. But before he could even make a second step—

*WAM!*

Saya punched him again, right in his lower stomach.

"OoOHH SSSHH*T!" Tora cried out and fell to the ground, clutching his behind rather than his stomach.

"Hehehehehehehe!" Saya giggled in delight, "Aren't laxatives _great_?!"

Tora churned in fear and attempted to crawl away past her feet.

"You know," Saya easily stepped on his back, pinning him to the ground with one foot. "Somewhere out there, there's a tree producing oxygen so you can breathe…" Saya looked down on him mercilessly, "..._I think you owe it an apology_."

Tora clenched his teeth in fear, his eyes shifting to the table.

"Are you just gonna sit there and watch!?" he yelped at Misaki and Usui who were in shock.

Saya looked over at the Seika High students.

"Oh please," her tone completely softened, "Don't mind us, keep eating and enjoy the show," she smiled cheerfully.

Usui and Misaki looked at their plates and back at Saya.

Saya laughed as she caught on.

"No need to worry, I only tampered with the rich boy's food. If I had put something in yours, you would've felt it by now."

Usui tilted his head, then shrugged and took another bite.

"Usui, are you sure?..."Misaki still wasn't convinced.

"It's fine Misa-chan," Usui nommed.

"Now," Saya glared at Tora. "I want to make this **very** clear. I am done being your god damn pet," Saya snatched off the ruffly thing from her head and stuffed it into Tora's mouth. "How'd ya like THEM ruffles? UNCOMFORTABLE isn't it?!"

Tora started mumbling something.

"Shut up!" Saya smacked him upside the head.

Tora squirmed on the ground, obviously uncomfortable for certain bowel reasons.

"You dragged me here, made me dress up like some _FLOOZY_. YOU TOUCHED MY HAIR! You made me clean up after you, do your dam laundry," the list went on "You tried to take advantage of me—"

Usui stopped eating.

"—you had me be your personal f_rickin_ FOOTSTOOL for a day! IN THIS DRESS FOR PETE'S SAKE!" Saya kicked him in the stomach so hard that he spit out the cloth that she had crammed in his mouth.

"Im a PERSON!"

*kick*

"I have FEELINGS!"

*kick*

"I deserve RESPECT!"

*kick*

"R-*stomp*-E-*stomp*-S-*stomp*-P-*stomp*-E-*kick*-C-*stomp*-T! RESPECT!"

Usui tallied in his head that she had just used another song title.

Tora cried out with every kick of Saya's 6inch heels.

"My sTOMacH!—"

"OHhh _SHUT UP_!"

*kick*

"NOW kiss my shoe!" Saya ordered as he blubbered on the floor. "**Kiss. My. SHOE.**"

*kick*

"Umm," Misaki whispered to Usui, "…is…is it ok to just let her…?"

"Are you gonna try and stop her?" Usui raised an eyebrow.

Misaki shook her head, wide-eyed. She knew a life or death situation when she saw one.

Tora's legs were trembling and he whimpered to the point of tears.

"Awwh," Saya bend down, making a compassionate face. "What's wrong? Oh, I know!" She flipped him over so he was on his back.

"You're still hungry, aren't you?"

Tora's eyes shrunk in peril. He went to heave himself up and out of the line of fire—But Saya stomped right on his stomach, pinning him back down again.

"OOHHH FFFFFFFF—I CANT HOLD IT!" Tora snarled up at his tormentor.

"Well youre gonna have to," Saya hissed and used her foot to press harder on his stomach. Tora wailed and squeezed his thighs together.

"These heels sure are really coming in handy today, don't you think Tiger-kun?"

"Now now Wildcat," Usui approached the scene. "That's just cruel…"

Both Saya and Tora looked at him suspiciously. Usui squatted down on the other side of Tora and they saw what he had in his hands.

"…not letting a guy finish his dinner when the food is this good," he stirred the bowl of dipping sauce that Saya had set at Tora's seat. "That's just torture."

Saya laughed skeptically in surprise at Usui's behavior.

_Who IS this guy?_

Misaki sat alone at the table, conflicted.

"You…" Tora panted, "..you wouldn't dare…in my HOUSe?!" Tora realized. "MAKI! _MAKI_! ANYBODY! GET THIS CRAZY B—"

"Maki's gone," Saya informed him and applied more pressure to his stomach. "I sent him on a tampon run—which was a complete lie by the way Ha! The kitchen staff took a vacation, you fired your old housekeeping people, and your parents are never around…."

Tora's breath was going ragged.

"I'll call the police," he panicked and went for his pocket with his cell—

"You're gonna have to GET to a phone before you can call the police," Saya waved the cell phone in front of him, just out of reach. She hadn't given it back to him since she had called her father.

Tora angrily tried to snatch it out of her hand but she was too quick and slipped it back into her apron pocket.

"Ah, ah, ah, you didn't say the magic word," Saya tisked her finger at him. "Ah,ah,ah, not till you finish your dinner," she said with a wily smile, then held her hand out to Usui for the bowl. But he wouldn't give it to her.

"I'll do it," Usui said.

"Why?" Saya narrowed her eyes distrustfully.

"Because I think he'd like it if you were to feed him," he explained and looked at the guilty Tora. "Now here comes the airplane!" Usui mocked in a baby voice and made an obnoxious plane rudder noise.

Tora clamped his mouth shut, it was all he could do since the nausea had turned his limbs into rubber.

Saya studied Usui for a second.

_This kid…is a goof_.

She knew that Tora didn't like him that much, but why was this guy so willing to humiliate the rich boy?

"Shouldn't you be trying to help him?" she asked in mid chuckle. "Arent you guys sorta friends?"

"Im teaching him a lesson because I care," Usui was jabbing the spoon at Tora's closed mouth.

Saya gave him a doubtful look, but then shrugged. It wasn't like their relationship was any of her business. Plus she could tell Tora was VERY irritated with Usui, a guy, feeding him.

_Hehehehe._

Saya plugged Tora's nose so he couldn't breath.

Tora struggled for a few seconds, unwilling to open his airway. His legs jittered in protest.

Finally he gasped and unclenched his jaw, but instead of receiving a spoonful of the toxin, Usui just poured the whole bowl straight down the hatch.

Tora drank it all and then sputtered for air.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAH!" Saya cackled and slapped Usui on his shoulder, "NICE ONE!"

"You…" Tora choked, "You mafia tramp—"

Usui jabbed the spoon with the last of the laxatives back in Tora's face.

"Last bite," Usui chided.

"NO MORE!" Tora shook his head frantically. He was gonna explode any minute.

"USUI!" Misaki jolted out of her chair, finally snapped out of her dazed state. "That's enough! Cut it out!"

Tora was shocked by the voice of reason.

"She's right," Saya gave Tora one last jab in the stomach, "He looks like he's gonna blow."

"mmmm…" Usui pouted.

Tora's eyes were pinched shut with tension.

"Go do your business," Saya shooed him away with disgust, "But that bathroom better be SPARKLING when your done, got that?! For just ONCE in your life you are going to scrub a toilet! And so help me, if it looks like you were slacking in there," she pulled Tora to his feet by the collar, "_I'll make you lick it clean_."

Tora's eyes widened as her seriousness.

She gave him one last glare and then shoved him out of the dining room.

He broke out into the fastest waddle she had ever seen.

To be continued. . .

…

I had SO much fun writing that part. ITS SO EVIL! But will Saya escape from the pervy bro before he gets off the can? And just how much more culinary criticism can Saya take from Usui? FIND OUT NEXT!

**Next Chapter: **_Freedom isn't free!_


	4. Chapter 4: Freedom Isn't Free

**The following contains: a dangerously sexy alien (side-effects may result in nosebleeds), violence, a made-up representation of gangs, inappropriate language, embarrassing and awkward situations, feats of inhuman/unrealistic strength, speed, and mutant powers that cannot be achieved in real life (sadly) and should not be attempted unless you are an actual alien or mutant. And yes this is a USUI X OC alternate Universe.**

**DISCLAIMER: original manga and all rights belong to ****Hiro Fujiwara****, who is awesome.**

~o0o0o0o0o0o0o~

"Run Forrest! Run!" Saya laughed maniacally, "MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! AAAHHHAHAH! SERVES YOU RIGHT! Heheheh, get it? _SERVES_ him right, heheh," she snickered to Misaki and Usui who stared blankly back at her. "You know? It's a pun…. because maids _serve_ peopl—eh forget it," she rolled her eyes at them, and made her way over to the food.

"Uh…."Misaki began, "…I-I think it might be a good time for us to go…"

"But I haven't had desert yet," Usui objected stubbornly.

"Don't feel like your obligated to stay if I've made you uncomfortable," Saya sat down with her dinner in front of her. "That wasn't my intention, and sorry you had to witness that, but…do you have ANY idea how degrading this is?" she pointed to her outfit. "He needed to suffer."

"Trust me, I understand you completely," Misaki said with shameful sympathy.

Usui chuckled.

"How?" Saya tilted her head in a puzzled manner.

"Misa-chan works at a maid café," Usui sat back down, across from Saya.

Saya's eyes bulged in pity.

"I am sooo **_sorry_**," she breathed, engulfed in sympathy.

"Thank you," Misaki looked like she was on the brink of tears, having found a fellow sufferer.

"You poor dear," Saya got up and ushered the lamenting President to her seat. "There there, let me bring you desert, eating always helps! It heals the soul, I swear," Saya patted Misaki comfortingly.

Usui felt oddly left out during their moment of bonding…

"But what about President Igarashi?" Misaki gave Saya a worried look.

"Pssh," Saya waved away the concern. "He'll be in there for some time, trust me! At least an hour and a half, I mean I used a whole bottle of laxatives… And then it'll probably take him another twenty minutes just to try and figure out how to use the toilet brush."

Misaki couldn't help but laugh.

"And when he does come down here," Usui's chin was resting in his hand, "what do you intend to do, Wildcat?"

"Im not planning on sticking around long enough for that," Saya said. "Once Im done eating, Im out."

"So you'll go back home?"

"Ha!" Saya laughed bitterly. "..yeah right…"she mumbled.

_And have my father just bring me back here? I don't think so._

"You mean you cant go back home?" Misaki asked, looking troubled.

"Eh, don't worry about it," Saya waved away the question again. "Now do you guys want the rest of this food or just desert? Cuz if you're not gonna finish it, I will. No way Im leaving any leftovers for that nancy-boy…"

"I'll have the rest of my dinner," Usui gazed at her. "I wouldn't pass up the chance to savor the taste of the Wildcat's cooking."

Saya gave Usui a funny look, then turned to Misaki.

"Is your boyfriend always this much of a pain?"

Misaki gagged.

"B-bOYFRIEND?! You've got it all wrong!" she clarified. "Usui's just a friend. I'd never date someone like him."

"Yah, Prez prefers Third-rate-red-headed idiots, guess Im too good for that," Usui took a bite of the 4th course.

"How many times have I told you to stop calling him that?!" Misaki went red with anger. "He has a name you know!"

"But Misa-chan gets mad when I say _You-kun_," Usui sang.

"That's because I don't want you calling him that either!"

"So what kind of boxers does _You-kun_ wear, huh Prez?"

"HOW SHOULD I KNOW!?" she roared in Usui's face.

"If you're curious I could tell you," he took a bite of his 6th course.

"_HUUUHH_?!"

"I could get a photo too."

Misaki blushed darker than ever. Saya chewed her food while they bickered back and forth. Apparently Usui wasn't just a pain in the ass, he was also a pathological flirt with no shame.

"STOP TEASING ME ABOUT IT ALREADY YOU IDIOT!"

"Got it, got it," Usui turned his attention back to Saya and took a spoonful his ice cream.

She stared him down as he took a bite.

"Isn't this recipe usually served with coffee flavored ice cream rather than chocolate?"

"I don't like coffee," Saya said tartly.

"It would've complimented the maple syrup drizzle better."

"I could agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong," Saya gave him a smile.

Usui laughed at her sarcasm, her attitude was only fueling his interest.

Misaki smiled, there wasn't to many people who could make Usui laugh.

"So is that your only criticism? Or do you have more to say?" Saya said patiently.

"Sorry," Usui smirked at her, "cat's got my tongue."

Saya blinked at him.

_What is with this smoldering look he's giving me?_

"Keep talking," Saya got up from her chair, "Someday, you'll say something intelligent."

"You're leaving already?" Misaki asked, still working on her desert.

"I've gotta find where that jackass stashed my real clothes first."

"I'll help," Usui started to rise from his seat.

"What with your IQ? I don't think so," she laughed and left the room.

"AHAHAH!" Misaki cracked up. "She just called you stupid! Finally someone who agrees with me!"

Usui blinked numbly.

"You know, she's a lot nicer then I expected…" Misaki's laugh slowly died down and she finished her food. "I cant believe her father would do something like that though," she said glumly.

Usui stared at the seat where the Wildcat had been sitting.

"You don't think she's gonna be in trouble for how she treated President Igarashi, do you Usui?"

~o0o0o0o0o0o~

Saya was surprised the rich boy hadn't thrown her clothes away, but she felt much better now. She was finally free of that infernal wedgie-ridden outfit and was able to let her hair down.

She put her hood up and headed back towards the stairs when she heard the bathroom door. She turned around and the rich bastard was standing there, huffing.

"Ugh," Saya waved her hand frantically to repel the foul current of pungent air, "couldn't you have at least sprayed some air-freshener? God almighty you stink!"

"You..are going to pay for that," he said darkly, his faced still flushed from sickness.

"Doubt it, Im an agent of karma," Saya gave him the 'talk to the hand' pose.

Tora sneered at her and was about to close in but she interrupted him.

"You know, that rich-b*tchy attitude is gonna get you nowhere with that girl…or any girl for that matter…"

"What?" Tora glared at her resentfully.

"If you haven't noticed, she's not the type to be bought off, or get intimidated by your 'class'," Saya quoted in a mocking tone. "And trying to use me to make her jealous is the dumbest idea I've ever heard. If I didn't already know you were blonde, I would've assumed."

Tora shuffled his feet.

"What were you expecting her to do? Spontaneously have the urge to replace me as your maid?"

He blinked in shock, how had she read THAT much into this?

Saya gaped at him in disgust.

"Oh my god that IS what you wanted!? That's messed up," she pointed at him disapprovingly.

"Then how SHOULD I have proceeded, eh? Since youre such an expert?" Tora hissed at her.

"Why don't you try _being nice_?"

"Nice isn't really my thing," Tora smirked coldly at her. Misaki and Saya had already made that clear, in several ways.

"Look," Saya sighed. "You act like a really big sick, twisted, jackass, and Im sure your parents never hugged you as a kid, but even I can see you have potential."

Tora stared at her.

"Do yourself a favor. Climb down off your stupid high horse, show people some respect, and then maybe you might actually make some friends who aren't plotting to murder you behind your back."

He let a sour laugh escape from his lips. This girl too, was just way to interesting. She was smacking him right in the face with the double-edged sword of his own pride, and at the same time she was telling him he wasn't that bad of a person…. even after all he had put her through. Somehow he felt slightly moved.

"Im leaving now," Saya threw his cell phone to him and he caught it. "Have fun explaining this to my father." She turned on her heel and left.

Tora smirked to himself. She obviously had forgotten about the phone in the bathroom that he had just hung up…

Usui and Misaki were at the door when Saya came down.

"You found them," Misaki smiled at Saya's clothes, glad that she didn't have to endure the maid uniform any longer.

"Yep!" Saya skipped happily to the door.

"…you look like a boy again.." said Usui, looking rather disappointed.

"Good!" Saya smiled and opened the door.

**"_FREEZE!_!"**

Saya slammed it back shut.

"Sh*t! It's the fuzz…" she squinted darkly and peeked out the window. They were 5 cop cars parked all around the circle drive, with a spot light on the door. "The rich boy must've called them."

"Wow," Usui peeked around her.

**_"Saya! Come out with your hands up!"_**

"Oh its my parole officer!" Saya waved gleefully out the window. "BE RIGHT OUT PUDDIN' POP!"

Usui and Misaki both looked at each other.

"…Puddin' Pop..?" Usui twitched.

"I know! Isnt that the dumbest nickname you've ever heard!? He cant stand it, Heheheh!" she grabbed the doorknob. "Make a break for it once the coast is clear, you copy?"

"Negative," Usui grabbed Saya's arm and she turned to Usui with an unfriendly expression.

"You have 10 seconds to let go before I choke you out."

Usui didn't flinch.

"10…" Saya threatened, "9-8!" She fake-lunged at him, expecting him to retreat in fear but he didn't.

She glowered at him, frustrated. He had seen up close and personal that she could kick the crap out of someone. So why wasn't he scared of her? ..And the bigger question, why hadn't she attacked him?

He smirked at her.

_Stupid smartass!_ What the hell was it about this guy that made her lose her focus?! And what the hell was he looking at her like that for!?

"What are you waiting for?" Usui still had a hold on her arm and was slowly starting to pull her towards him. " 'Hit Me With Your Best Shot', " he leaned forward and whispered in her ear.

Her mind went blank for an instant before she sent a furious fist flying at his kidney.

Usui winced in surprise and dropped his hold on her arm. He held his side tenderly, looking wounded.

"That hurt."

Saya blinked awkwardly at him.

"..I gave you fair warning…"she mumbled, trying not to feel guilty. But for some reason his expression made her feel apologetic.

_Pssh, Don't apologize! He was asking for it!_

_Was_ she going soft? She turned to the door—

"Minatsuki."

"What?" Saya looked back at him, taking the precaution to glare.

" 'Don't You Forget About Me'…." Usui gazed at her with his deep green eyes.

He was quoting the song from The Breakfast Club. And he was wearing that face again, a cross between smartass and devastatingly Deeee-licious.

_HOLD UP! **HE IS NOT**!_

" 'You better check yourself before you Wreck yourself'," she mumbled and plugged her headphones in. Then she saluted to Misaki "President Ayuzawa," and went out the door, snatching a fancy vase/blunt-object-to-be-used-as-weapon from the house as she left.

**"_Saya, put the weapon down!_"** her parole officer projected through the megaphone.

"Stay calm," Saya called out and hid the vase behind her back, "It's only a sugar doughnut!"

**"_I repeat, PUT the weapon DOWN!"_**

"YOU WANT ME TO PUT THE HAMMER DOWN!?" She launched the vase at one of the cars; it smashed right through the window. The cops ducked in panic as glass shattered everywhere.

Running at full speed, Saya slid across the hood of one of the cars and bolted towards the street, chucking silverware she had stashed in her jacket to keep the cops occupied.

"YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!"

Usui and Misaki watched in silence as she disappeared down the road, the cop cars flashing sirens and taking off after her.

"AHAHAHAHAH!" Usui burst into tears of laughter.

"Don't laugh!" Misaki chided behind a smile. "…But that was crazy!"

Usui nodded in agreement, his laughter slowly dying down.

"She's reckless…that Wildcat…"

Saya easily lost the cops through the alleyways, though she almost suffered a mild heart attack from all the running. But she knew the territory much better than the cops, plus its pretty hard to catch someone doing parkour when you're driving around in a car (A/N: I WISH I COULD DO PARKOUR!).

The cops hadn't seemed as determined to catch her as normal. She suspected it was because Tora hadn't given them enough reason to really bring her in. Though that might change once her father learned of the situation.

She took a deep breath.

She needed to find a place to sleep. She decided the Print Shop would be her safest option.

Back before she had gotten expelled from school, she had been pretty active in her art classes. Her art teacher owned a Print Shop and even taught extracurricular college classes there. She was more into drawing and painting but he had suggested she give printmaking a try.

She found the process to be pretty cool, and her teacher had given her an ID card key to get into the shop whenever she wanted.

With it being about midnight, she couldn't think of anywhere else to go. Plus no one would look for her there.

_Unless he caught on…_

The only person who even possibly knew she liked art was Taizo, the guy who her father had originally been planning on setting her up with. He was always creeping around in her room, looking for an excuse to "wrestle" or spar.

There was a reason why Taizo was her father's right hand man. He was a beast in the Showdown tournaments. Everyone called him the Phantom because you could never tell where his deadly blows came from, and before you knew it your ribs were smashed.

Saya shuddered at the thought of him coming looking for her.

She was actually faster than him, the only person faster than him. And she could usually predict his movements; hence she usually won when she fought against him. But he was stronger than her. He was the only person she had ever fought whose punches knocked the wind right out of her, so she **had **to act fast before he could land a hit.

And he was just crazy; in the cage and in his head.

He always had such a sick look on his face when they fought against each other.

He had even licked her blood off his knuckles once when he had given her a bloody lip.

_YuuuuCK! Sick! Creep! Sick sick sick SICKO! GROSS!_

She sloughed her hands together wildly, spasing out as if she had an invisible spider web on her.

She hated that guy. He was probably one of the few things that she was afraid of…plus water…plus frilly frou-frou stuff…

Maybe if she called her father and told him upfront what had happened, he wouldn't send out a search…? She doubted it, but she'd have to talk to him sometime.

She pulled out her cell and called.

Someone picked up, but didn't say anything.

". . .Just checking in…" she said, waiting for a reply.

"_I've missed your voice, Saya_."

She cursed to herself wretchedly. It was Taizo.

"Is my father not in? Or did you become his personal secretary as well as his butt-wipe?"

"_It's Friday Saya. You know he doesn't answer his phone while the tournaments are in commence_," his slick, eerie voice replied.

"Right," Saya thought to herself. Maybe he hadn't heard about how she had ran out on the rich boy. "Nevermind then—"

"_I know you've missed me Saya, why else would you have called?" _

"Keep dreaming," Saya's lip curled in disgust.

"_I think about you all the time…and I know you think about me_." His voice was low and gripping.

Saya felt herself shiver. _I swear I've heard that line from some creepy character in an anime..._

"If you mean, I think about how youre a PSYCHO, then yes. It crosses my mind quite often," she said with much force, though her eyes were widening in dread.

"_I was so happy to hear you turned down Igarashi_."

"Does my father know?" Saya's voice sharpened.

"_Not yet_," Taizo answered in his sleek chilling voice. "_I plan to tell the Boss after the show tonight. I want to see his face…and hear your punishment_." He sounded sickly enthused.

"Gee thanks…" she didn't know what to say.

He laughed highly on the other side.

"_I cant wait to see you Saya. In fact Im not sure I can wait at all_…"

She wanted to hang up, but she had to outsmart him and get him to…be patient...(?)

"You damn well better wait! Or else—" she stopped herself.

_Threatening is not going to work moron! _she reminded herself.

"Uh," she squeezed her eyes shut in frustration, trying to come up with something, "my father will hold it against you for acting on your own just like he did when you screwed up with the Igarashi's (?)" It wasn't exactly a strong strategy, but she was gonna have to go with it.

Taizo was silent on the other end.

"_Where are you_?"

"Im telling you," she continued. "If you act before you tell him about this, he's gonna get pissed. And then you can kiss you're position as his number two and his possible successor good-bye."

She wasn't exactly lying. Her father was always a control freak when it came to making decisions.

"_True_…" his voice lingered gingerly over the phone. "_But it might be worth it if I could get a few unsupervised screams out of you_."

"I'd rip out my own vocal cords before I let that happen," she answered with much disdain.

She heard him cackle.

"_Don't tempt me Saya_," he sounded even more stimulated. "_You know how I love it when you dance_."

She writhed in revulsion, holding in her inner loathing.

He always said that when they fought, how he loved making her dance till she bled or something. She was never really sure if he was actually referring to how she would dance to her IPod or if it was an insult to her fighting technique, or if he was just being creepy.

Whichever the case, it creeped her out beyond being creeped out.

"Im hanging up now."

"_Sweet dreams then, Saya. Im sure you'll be hearing from us soon. And if not, I'd watch your back…you never know what might try to ravage you from the shadows_."

"I hope you catch the plague." She snapped her phone shut. "UUUGGH! SIcK! SiCK! SICK! Oh _YUCKKK!_ GAWD WHYYYYYY?! _WHHYYYYYY?! **WHYYYYYYYY?!**_" Saya cried and torn at herself as if she had a spider web on her again.

"BlaaH!" she gagged and shook her head.

Things didn't look too pretty. And Taizo would probably make the story sound as bad as possible in order to get her into more trouble.

"Why couldn't I have just been born a boy?" she mumbled and looked at the sky. The stars were out. "Why couldn't we both have been born somewhere else?" she whispered, thinking of her big brother.

She missed him.

Seito was the only person she had ever really cared for. She didn't really remember her Mom. She had some aunts, uncles, and a cousin on her mother's side, but Seito had been her favorite person in the whole world. He was the one who had gotten her into music, especially the oldies.

She sighed.

She figured she was gonna get disowned from the family…not that she minded that much. It hadn't been much of a family since her mom and brother had died. But still, what did she have now? What was she going to do?

_…If only I at least had my sword …_ That had also been a memento of Seito's.

She sighed and put her headphones in, though she didn't know what to listen to. Saya hit the shuffle button and randomly, her IPod selected a song.

Saya half laughed at what was playing.

It was 'Hit Me With You're Best Shot.'

Her thoughts drifting back to a green-eyed smartass from outer space that also apparently listened to oldie american music. She let it play and headed towards the print shop, keeping a wary eye out for Cutthroats and Phantoms just in case.

"_Fire away_," she mumbled with a smirk.

To be continued. . .

…

Thank you so much to those of you who are reading and following this story! MAKES ME SO HAPPY! SEE THIS FACE : ^-^ THAT'S ME! ^_^ And **Canichan001** thanks so much for your comment, cuz some ppl really have had a problem with the OCxUsui pairing, but….yeah Im gonna keep writing anyway. For Saya's description it would probably be like Re-L from Ergo Proxy but with no makeup and dark brown/red hair, so Sakura's hair is pretty close to what I was thinking of. I might draw her if you guys want a visual. And that would give me an excuse to draw Usui….*drool* ... And thanks for the support **killthepain62**! ^_^

Coming up is a lot more Usui and Saya nonsense. Stalking will be involved, but from Usui or the Taizo creep? Also, Saya realizes that Usui's good looks could come in handy for certain reasons yet to be revealed. They are bound to be yummy. PLEASE KEEP READING! And comment if you have any idea on stuff you might want to happen, Im always looking for new ideas/inspiration. THANKS!

**Next Chapter:** _DO aliens cry?_


	5. Chapter 5: Do Aliens Cry?

**The following contains: a dangerously sexy alien (side-effects may result in nosebleeds), violence, a made-up representation of gangs, inappropriate language, embarrassing and awkward situations, feats of inhuman/unrealistic strength, speed, and mutant powers that cannot be achieved in real life (sadly) and should not be attempted unless you are an actual alien or mutant. And yes, this is a USUI X OC alternate Universe.**

**DISCLAIMER: original manga and all rights belong to ****Hiro Fujiwara****, who is awesome.**

**~o0o0o0oo0o0o~**

It was the next day, Saturday.

Saya had spent the night at the Print Shop but it was not a place she would want to sleep at again. In addition to the dust and creepy cobwebs, the air was stuffy with fumes from the ink and other chemicals; which had resulted in her feeling rather whoozy when she woke in the morning.

_I should've slept on the roof…_

She had snuck in and out of some private fitness center so she could take a shower and had been walking around aimlessly ever since.

Saya was strolling down a less busy street, in what you might call the bad part of town. A.k.a: Cutthroat territory, so she knew the area well. She had been thinking about going to the Showdown, but wasn't sure.

She had her bag from the print shop with her sketchbook and pencils/markers incase she got bored and saw something interesting to doodle.

She sighed to herself, troubled over her homeless situation.

_I miss my sword…_

Then she noticed something across the street.

A car had stopped two little kids.

"…N-no thank you," the little girl, probably 7 yrs old, was saying to the driver. Her younger brother was holding her hand with a wide naïve eyes.

"But… its just candy right…" the little boy looked up at his sister.

"Yeah," the driver smiled. "Just hop on in and its yours, c'mon kid—"

"Excuse me," Saya was at the man's car window.

He jumped in surprise at the sudden appearance, her hood making her look all the more sinister.

"Is everything alright here?" Saya gave the two kids a stern look, though the answer was obvious.

"Sure sure! We're fine," the driver talked smoothly. "I was just saying hi to my friend's kids. Right, Naoko?"

"That's not my name," the little girl shook her head fearfully.

The driver's face tightened.

"Stop kidding around _Naoko_ and get in the car so I can take you two home like I promised your parents—"

Saya cut him off by grabbing his collar and yanking his head through the window.

"I don't think these kids know you," she said darkly.

"Hey hey!" the man waved his hands nervously. "I-I didn't mean no harm! I was j-just..just talking to them!"

"For what purpose?" she demanded an explanation.

"Relax! I-im not a bad guy! I love kids! I-I was just gonna give them a ride—"

"Oh you love kids huh?" Saya pulled his collar tighter while she reached into her book bag for a marker. "Then you wont mind if I…"

"W-what are you doing?!" the man asked shakily as she started writing on his forehead.

"Done! See," she shoved him so he could see his reflection in the mirror of the car.

On his forehead was the word: "_Pedophile_".

"Now everyone will know just how much you love kids!" she added with a smile.

The man flinched when there was a sudden flash.

"And now I've got your picture," Saya said, holding her cell phone. "So if I hear anything about some kid getting too much **love** I'll be having a chat with the police. _Understand_?"

The guy nodded in fear and sped off in his car.

"Sicko," she mumbled to herself and wrote the car's license plate number on her hand so she wouldn't forget it and report him.

If she hadn't had two little witnesses present, she would've beat that guy till he turned blue and then ran him over with his own car…and then maybe buried him.

"Are you two alright?" she squatted down to their level.

The little boy was hiding behind his sister shyly, but nodded. He looked like he was 5.

"Yeah," the little girl said hesitantly. "T-thank you Miss."

"No problem," Saya smiled.

The little boy smiled back.

"My name's—"

"Ahhhh-ppah-pah-pah!," Saya stopped him. "Don't go giving out your name to strangers like that, little man. Now where's your Mom and Dad?"

"Um," the little girl shifted her feet. "Our mom forgets to pick us up from day-care sometimes…"

"Oh," Saya nodded. "Do you know her phone number?"

The little girl shook her head.

"Hmmm," Saya looked at the two of them.

"It's okay though," the little girl said, "we walk home a lot, it's not too far. We'll be okay," the little girl tucked her brother under her arm.

_Awwwwwwwwww….aaawwww…_ Saya heartstrings tugged.

"How about I walk with you guys?—If that's okay?"

The little girl's eyes bulged in relief and she nodded her head.

"Alright you lead the way, little lady," Saya gestured forward.

Usui had been following Saya since he had seen her exiting the High Class Fitness Center.

He smiled at Saya's startled expression when the little girl latched on to her hand. He had been on stand-by incase the situation with the creep in the car escalated, but he thought the Wildcat had handled it fairly well.

He chuckled to himself as he followed them, listening to how Saya was telling the children to shout "STRANGER DANGER!" or "I DON'T KNOW YOU!" at the top of their lungs if they ever got scared like that again.

Finally they reached the kids' house just as a frazzled woman walked out the door.

"Mom!" the little boy took off into the yard happily.

"Where have you been?! Ive been looking all over!" the mother scolded, looking like she'd been passed out for God knows how long. "And who's this guy?" she shot at Saya, clearly seeing: Person with a hood on=Criminal.

"Mom—"

"I don't want you hanging around hoodlums like that! You know better! Now get inside," she marshaled her kids along. The little girl barely managed to wave before the door shut.

"Gee," Saya mumbled to herself. "Thanks for saving my children from getting kidnapped and walking them home like their MOTHER should have been doing in the first place," she said in a false cheery voice, imitating a ditzy woman.

"Your Welcome Mrs. Irresponsible! Arent you glad there are hoodlums like me in this wonderful world to look out for our little ones!? Kids are the future you know," she nodded, talking in a much deeper voice than her own.

"Why, yes young hooligan boy. Yes I am glad I can count on a gang member to look both ways before letting my kids cross the street. Oh dear! Please excuse me, I left the iron on and my smoke alarm is going off! I sure hope my skinny jeans don't catch fire!"

Saya gagged to herself.

Saya couldn't help but feel bad for the kids for having a mom like that. But she did feel good about one thing.

"Hehehe, I knew I could still pull off looking like a guy, heheheh." She strutted away from the house proudly.

"You cant blame her for being confused."

Saya whipped her head around and almost tripped over her own feet at how close Usui was standing right behind her.

_DEFENSIVE POSITION!_ Saya backed up a safe distance.

"If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I wouldn't have believed you were a girl either," he said lightly.

"Like Ive never heard that one before…" she mumbled cynically to herself.

_How did I not notice him!? _

Saya hadn't heard footsteps, or even caught his scent. No one could sneak up on her like that, not even Taizo. Wearing a dress for the past few days must've really dulled her senses.

…_or maybe he really IS an alien_….

"That was nice of you though," he changed the subject, "Telling off that guy and walking those kids home. Not something I would expect from a gangster."

"You saw that? That was like 10 minutes ago…" Saya blinked.

_Dammit I AM getting soft! YOU SUCK SAYA! _

"Yeah, I've been following you for a while. You didn't seem to catch on though…or maybe you just didn't mind?" he suggested.

_YOURE A FAILURE TO THE LEAF VILLAGE!_

"…You know," Saya pointed at Usui, "I thought you were kind of a cool person. But now I've realized you're a stalker."

"Can't I be both?" he gave her a playful look.

"…Um…no. No I don't think you can be both…" Saya stared at him, scrutinizing. "Yep…definitely from outer-space…"she mumbled and shook her head as she walked away.

He followed.

"Stop following me."

Saya didn't like being followed. Even though she knew he didn't mean her any harm, he was aggravating the hell out of her. No one could out-sneak her ninja senses. No one. She resented it.

She stopped and turned to him, looking him straight in the face.

"Go. Away."

"I want to see where you're going."

"Well I don't like it when people walk behind me. So can you _pleeeease_ go away?"

"What does it matter if someone's walking behind you?"

"I don't know," she shrugged with impatience. "Its creepy, and 98% of attacks come from the back, it makes me feel like 'Somebody's Watching Me', and it makes me think Im walking too slow and—"

"—oh, theres more?—" Usui blinked as the list went on.

"—then I start walking fast and then I'll start sweating, and sweating is gross, and I just don't want you walking behind me!" she finished.

"Okay…. Then I'll just walk next to you," he shrugged lightly.

V_V** Saya twitched.

"So where to?" Usui tugged on her backpack a little. "Camping out?"

"DON'T TOUCH MY PURSE!" she yanked it away from him, clutching it protectively. "I DON'T KNOW YOU!"

"That's mean Saya-chan, treating me like a stranger…Or did you really forget about me?" he raised his eyebrows in a pleading sort of way, like he was begging her to say it wasn't so.

"Uh.." Saya was unprepared for dealing with such piercing puppy dog eyes. "…No..i mean…" she looked at her shoes.

"So Im not a stranger?"

"Well…I guess not. But that doesn't mean—"

"You had me a little worried you know."

"Huh?" Saya's eyebrows knitted together.

"I thought you might have spent the night in jail after charging those cops like you did," he shook his head with a soft smile.

"Like those morons could ever catch me," Saya crossed her arms in proud defiance. "Even if they WERE smart enough, they'd never be fast enough..." She trailed off, thinking out loud. "But I bet Puddin' Pop called the search off early…He hates having to deal with me…hehehehehe," she snickered and Usui listened to her mumble.

He couldn't help but chuckle at her ridiculous joy in tormenting her parole officer.

"So where did you stay last night, Wildcat?" Not knowing was making him somewhat uneasy.

"I found a place," she mindlessly kicked at the ground. "But I need to find a new one before I catch the black lung…stupid crappy ventilation…"

Usui listened to how carefree she sounded, but he knew she was probably more troubled than she seemed.

_Dammit…I want my frickin sword back! ..and I need a clean change of clothes…_She was going to have to figure out a solution to her situation soon….and face her father. More importantly she wanted her dam sword back.

"So where will you go?"

"None of your business, your not my parole officer." Saya put in her headphones.

Usui smirked at her.

"But I want to know," he said.

She ignored him and started to walk away.

"Because if you don't have anywhere to stay, Id be willing to share my bed with you."

"What the HELL did you just say?!" Saya sputtered at him ludicrously.

She was very much considering kneeing him in the crotch and watching him cry.

_Wait…do aliens cry?_

"Oh, so you can hear me," Usui brushed his fingers down the side of her face and pulled a headphone out of her ear. "Just testing."

Saya watched him with caution. This guy had NO sense of personal space. If she punched him, she half suspected he would tackle her back or put her in a chokehold or something. He HAD to be good at martial arts if he was this confident around her. She needed to keep her guard up, expect the unexpected.

His stupid flirty and "concerned" manner was not fooling her…even though his intention did seem sort of friendly… Like a really annoying friend who only talks to you because they think your older brother is hot, and they borrow your chapstick without asking and never gave it back, and you always find yourself asking, "Why the hell am I friends with them again?...oh ya, because they have a dog and I don't have a dog, but I always wanted a dog…"

Usui put the headphone to his ear and realized it was silent.

"Nothing?" he gave her a curious look and let her snatch it back out of his hand.

"Sometimes I wear them so people _think_ I cant hear them," she plugged her ears back in.

"Oh. So you eavesdrop on peoples conversations without them knowing. Sneaky," Usui nodded with approval.

"I don't eavesdrop! I have no need to! If I wanted information I'd just beat it out of someone!" she huffed. "I wear them because: when people think I can't hear them, they don't talk to me." Saya glanced at Usui. "Most of the time."

"Ah, I see," he affirmed. "Either way you still avoid social interaction."

"So he CAN read minds!" she threw her hands up. "Now that you understand my disinterest in human contact, GO AWAY."

"I thought I was an exception since I'm from outer space."

"Sure," she nodded. "I've always wanted to get abducted by martians. You're a real dream come true," she said with biting sarcasm.

"I knew we had something special." He gave her a look that melted though her pessimism. "So is that a yes?"

"Yes what?"

"You can bunk over?"

She shot him an uncanny look.

"Don't you know how weird that sounds? If you didn't have good taste in music, I'd be punching you in your jugular right now."

"I'm just being friendly," Usui claimed coolly.

"Asking somebody you hardly know to sleep over for free is not friendly, it's fishy," Saya corrected and walked off.

"I didn't say it'd be free," Usui easily kept pace next to her, his hands in his pockets.

"Right. So what's the catch, oh so generous pal?" she rolled her eyes.

"In exchange you'd have to be my personal maid for a day."

Saya froze dead in her tracks.

_How. Dare. He._

She turned on him and yanked him by his collar.

"What a SILLY thing for you to say _buddy_," she gave him her deadliest stink-eye. "I wouldn't know anything about beings someone's maid, _Right_? Because Ive never _been_ anyone's maid, **_Right_**?"

"Sure you have. You served me desert yesterday, remember?"

"You're **sooo** delusional! HAHAHAH!" Saya patted (pounded) his head while she still strangled him by the collar.

"No," Usui grabbed her hand before she could strike him again. "You're just in denial."

"DAM RIGHT I AM!" she shouted. "AND I WONT EVER RECOVER! So unless you don't want to live the rest of your life with a stump for a leg, I suggest you keep quiet about that little incident."

Usui was about to point out how passionately her free hand was tugging on his shirt and ask if she needed help with the buttons, but suddenly—

"_SSSSHHHHHHHHHH_!" she wretched her hand out of his grasp, putting a finger to her lips and looked at him with urgent doey-eyes. "Do you hear that?" she whispered with suspenseful happiness and looked off in the distance.

"…No." Usui blinked at her. He didn't hear anything.

"Listen!" she tugged on his collar more. She looked like a pyro-maniac waiting for fireworks to go off.

Then he thought he heard something, the faintest sound of some sort of music box jingle.

"DO YOU HEAR IT?!" she was almost jumping for joy. "It sounds like its about 5 blocks down, 2 blocks over." She took of like lightning.

Usui had to shield his eyes from the dust.

"_I scream! You scream! We all scream For ice cream!_" Saya's voice echoed as she disappeared after the sound of the ice-cream truck.

Usui sighed to himself.

She had totally just ditched him for a cheap frozen desert that you could find at any local convenience store . . .

"Maan…" Saya moped, mumbling over the price. It wasn't until after she had flagged down the Ice-cream Truck Man that she realized she had absolutely no money. She had spent it on a bag of Cheetos earlier.

"Well kid? Are ya buying something or not?" the man asked from the window.

Saya twitched. She wanted that damn strawberry-shortcake and she was gonna get it one way or another.

"Uh…" She saw Usui approaching out of the corner of her eye. "Actually, no. I don't have enough. But I think you've got another customer."

She headed over to Usui.

"Hey," she said in a hushed voice. "Wanna get some free ice cream?"

"Are you offering to treat me?" Usui tilted his head.

"Mmm, yah..sorta," Saya brushed over her answer. "You just go up front and distract the ice cream man while I sneak into the back of the truck and stuff as much ice cream into my bag as possible." She flashed an angelic smile.

Usui raised his eyebrows.

"You mean free as in stolen?" Maybe he shouldn't have been surprised.

"Oh c'mon buddy! I've done it a million times," she coaxed with a jolly grin and smacked him on the shoulder. "Take a walk on the wild side!"

Usui rubbed his forehead with a laugh.

"There has to be another more legal way to get some ice cream. Plus I have a feeling you'd ditch me once the deed was done and I'd get framed for it."

"I'm the one doing the dirty work! If you got caught you'd just plead innocent and they'd have no case," she explained but she could see Usui wasn't buying it.

She sighed.

"I would buy one," she looked at the truck, "but its too expensive." She didn't want to admit she was poverty-stricken since she was pretty much exiled. She needed to find a job soon since she'd probably be on her own from now on.

"I'll get one for you if you really want one," Usui offered. He wasn't so blind to her penniless situation.

Saya shook her head.

"I wouldn't want you hanging the bill over my head."

"I wouldn't want you to pay me back with cash."

Saya's eyes narrowed at him in suspicion. Sure enough he was wearing that stupid smug-faced smile.

"Be my personal maid for a day."

Saya's nose flared in rage, but before she could murder him, 3 witnesses approached.

"Umm, excuse me," one of the girls blushed at Usui. "Would you, uh, want to get some ice cream with us?" The 3 girls waited nervously for his answer.

"Sorry," he dismissed them. "I'm broke."

Saya watched closely as he turned them down.

_Dam…he is such a good liar…Remarkable…_ She made note.

"That's alright!" one of the girls blurted.

"It's on us!" another insisted.

"I'll pass," he put an arm around Saya. "It would be rude of me to eat in front of my friend here."

In that instant Saya was blinded by rays of glorious pheromones. She pulled her hood down lower so no one could see her uncomfortably flushed expression.

"Unless you want to share, Saya-chan?" he looked down at her with a persuasive sideways glance.

_…__Sparkles….Sooooo many SpArkles just now…._

She didn't know how it was possible for him to be making eye contact with her from under her hood, but his bright green eyes were all-seeing.

_..I really hope he can't read my mind right now…_

Saya had seen some good-looking guys in her life, but none of them (besides Taizo and Tora and she didn't count them since they were assholes) had ever really _persistently_ tried to talk to her. And none of them glowed like a frickin veela from Harry Potter.

It was unsettling. But at the same time…

_I'm single, I have every right to look! /_

Of course she knew that that was exactly what these 3 gawking vultures were thinking.

_But seriously, can't they show some restraint? They're practically undressing him with their eyes!_

At least she wasn't THAT desperate. She was willing to wait for her fictional-never-in-this-universe-going-to-happen-because-she-is-destined-to-die-utterly-alone-British-heart-throb.

Saya tuned back in to reality.

"I don't like to share," Saya smiled answering Usui's proposal. "So no thanks… I guess I'll just go hungry…" She turned her face away sadly, acting overly disappointed but also hoping to put some distance between her and those green eyes.

"I can't allow that," Usui played along and tightened his lock around her shoulders, shifting her so she had to look him in the face again.

"You can have my ice cream all to yourself then," a smirk pulled at Usui's lips.

The 3 girls gave each other dirty looks as Usui got closer to Saya.

"I couldn't do that, it's a gift for you!" she gestured back to the girls. "I wasn't even invited to eat with you guys. So please, forget about it and be on your merry way…I'll just go…maybe window shop or something…I'll be fine all alone, really," she gave her best starved-child face.

Usui looked back at the girls. Saya cringed in pity as the pheromones gushed out and swept over the 3 fangirls.

"Would it really be that much trouble for her to join us?" his voice sounded so sincere and yet dangerously compelling.

"N-no!" a girl wiped away a nosebleed.

"We can get her one too!" another drooled.

Usui smirked at Saya as the three girls took their orders and ran to get their ice cream.

"Does that happen a lot?" Saya asked as the two of them ate, having just farewelled the 3 suckers.

Usui gave a reluctant nod.

"It can get irritating though."

"Who cares!" Saya laughed at him. "You can get free food wherever you go!"

"So?"

Saya scoffed.

"SO you have a gift! You should put it to good use!"

"You call that a gift?" Usui gave her a funny look. Was he supposed to take that as a compliment?

"Yah. How many other people do you know who can get free stuff just with their face? None." She took another bite of her ice cream bar. "Geeze, I have no idea how you've stayed so skinny. If I were you, I'd be a whale."

"If I let myself get fat, wouldn't that dull my charm?" Usui smiled at her logic.

"Oh…" she said with a somewhat defeated expression.

Usui could see she was trying to figure out a solution to her dilemma at hand, so he threw out an idea.

"We could work it out to where I draw in the free food and you keep me in shape."

"Yah!" Saya nearly lost her last bit of strawberry short-cake off the popsicle stick as she pointed at him. "Because I would eat all you're leftovers! Brilliant!" she beamed and ate the last of her desert.

"Shouldn't _you_ be worried about the consequences of eating all those sweets then?" he teased her.

"Are you kidding? My ideal death is dying fat and happy overdosing on whipped cream."

Usui smiled at her, laughing lightly at her brusqueness.

She was definitely making it clear that she loved to eat, though her body type was still rather fit. The maid outfit she had worn at the pervy bro's had revealed that she had some undeniable curves, which was no doubt where all the sweets were going.

Usui finished his ice cream and studied her.

He still couldn't exactly figure out what to make of the "gift" she had commended him for having. She was basically pointing out that his looks could solve world hunger; and yet he doubted that one of his best gazes could've gotten _her_ to surrender a cookie.

An interesting stalemate.

It was different than Misaki. She didn't really let his looks get to her either, but that was either because she was completely unaware or she just wouldn't admit it. Whatever the reason, he was grateful for her friendship.

But Saya was blatantly aware, and had even told him so. It puzzled him that she could think about his looks and yet find more interest in the food they brought, rather than the looks themselves.

At the same time he was glad. If she was to busy drooling over him, he'd never be able to tease her like he did. Though eventually he would develop her taste buds to crave a whole different type of desert. (A/N: Usui you perv!)

Saya sighed as she cracked the bare popsicle stick with her teeth.

Her thoughts were shifting back to finding some shelter for the night. She had surprisingly had fun with Usui following her around; I mean she had gotten a FREE strawberry-shortcake! **_FREE!_**

She would've liked to get to know him better, she'd always wanted a really weird friend who could keep up with her loony train of thought. But that was the problem.

She didn't keep friends. And if she made acquaintances, she kept them distant. Friends were liable to get hurt. She didn't need another death on her conscience; Seito was already enough. And if she never got too close, then it never hurt to say good-bye.

"Well," she chewed on half a popsicle stick. "Nice knowing ya Usui." She made to turn the corner opposite of the direction he was walking. "Thanks for the ice cream," she waved.

"What's with the sudden exit?" Usui shot her a killer glance, his green eyes piercing. "Something wrong?"

"Oh no…. don't take it personally," Saya stretched. "I just never wanna see you again."

Usui blinked.

Then he half laughed, half scoffed.

"Talk about not pulling your punches," he looked at his feet.

Saya doubted she had hurt his ego, but she wanted to make it clear.

"No hard feelings? Good. Pip pip cheerio!" she gave him a sarcastically cheesy smile and continued walking.

"Actually—" Usui started.

"Sorry!" Saya shouted with her back to him as she left, her hand pointing to the side of her head. "Cant hear! Music too loud!"

Usui sighed as he watched her walk away.

She wasn't going to make this easy for him was she?

~o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o~

Usui really hadn't meant to follow her.

Really.

But when he had seen her zipping down the street on a grocery cart he couldn't help himself.

"You look like one of those homeless bag ladies," Usui gestured at Saya with amusement.

"Well…your not exactly wrong…" Saya mumbled.

She had been rounding up supplies like toilet paper and chewing gum, when she had come across the cart.

How could she pass up such a perfectly good opportunity to go cart skating? Cars, bikes, roller blades, she loved running people off the road.

"So you _don't_ have anywhere to stay?" Usui was still willing to give the sleep over idea another go.

"No, no. I found a place to stay," Saya continued to scoot along on the metal contraption. "I like sleeping outside."

Usui eyed her with unease. He didn't like the idea of her sleeping in such a vulnerable place.

"I appreciate you stopping by to say hello, but I'll be on my way now." She was gonna head back to the Print Shop and work on some drawings. "Catch you on the flipside." She was about to take off in her new wheels but at the last second Usui plopped down in the cart.

"Hey!" Saya frowned at the sudden hold up.

"Push me," Usui sat cross-legged in the cart with a rascally look on his face.

"What?! No!" she started kicking the cart. "This is not a taxi cab! You were born with two feet for a reason!"

"C'mon Saya-chan! Push me!" he rocked the cart impatiently.

"I'm NOT gonna push you!"

"Well I'm not getting out…so c'mon. You're starting to make me feel self-concsious…"

"FINE!" Saya gave in. "But as soon as I find a hill, I'm pushing you down it and letting you crash." She ran her legs as fast as she could. Hopefully he'd get cart-sick and throw-up so she could leave.

"Faster," Usui chanted.

"I thought I WAS going faster!" Saya rasped.

People were having to flee the sidewalks.

_"__Watch it!"_

_"__Slow down!"_

_"__Do you have a license for that?"_

"Faster!" Usui nagged as he enjoyed the wind ruffling through his hair.

"I'm giving her all she's got!" Saya panted.

"That's it?" Usui sounded disappointedly.

"Stop complaining smartass!"

"You suck."

"Maybe you're just FAT!"

"You're so unfeeling…"

"YOU'RE THE ONE BEING A SLAVE DRIVER!" Saya argued back and forth with him. Despite her wanting him to get the hell out of the cart and her lungs reaching the point of exploding, she was having fun.

Once she had enough momentum going, Saya hopped on to the tail end of the cart for the ride.

"WIDE LOAD COMING THROUGH!" she shouted to the scattering city-walkers.

The next thing she knew they were headed straight for heavy traffic.

"Iceberg ahead," Usui called calmly as he sat in the cart.

"SHH*****T!" Saya skidded a hard right and turned the corner. A wheel nearly gave out and they spun in a 360 as the cart reeled to a halt.

It was silent for a second.

Usui leaned backwards until he was looking at Saya from an upside down angle. His hair was messed up and hanging down, and he wore a wide inquisitive expression.

"Next time, I drive."

Saya gawffed at the state of him.

"I should've just let you wreck," she smiled and surged the cart forward, making him sit up.

"Why didn't you?" he asked smartly.

"Because I'd have to clean up the mess," she stated obviously. "Now get out of the cart!"

Usui smiled at her and got out.

"And for the LAST TIME," she said adamantly. "Good-bye and Good-riddance!"

"Where are you going?" he gave her that smoldering look again.

"None of your business—"

"Can I come?"

"NO!" she exasperated.

"I'll push you the whole way. Wherever it is."

Saya put on her business face as she considered his offer.

"You'll push me in the cart to my destination, and then leave?"

Usui grinned slyly.

"Anywhere you want."

"Swear it," she held out her pinky finger.

"Pinky swear," Usui smiled at the childish gesture and sealed the deal.

"Woohoo!" Saya's fist shot in the air. "Free trolley ride!"

She went to run around Usui to get into the cart, but suddenly her feet were swept out from under her and Usui had her in his arms, bridal style.

"_W_hat in the Hogwarts Express are you _DOING_?!" she flailed.

"Putting M'lady in her carriage."

"I can do it myself! I'm a grown woman—Put me down before your back gives out!"

She was surprised he could lift her up so easily. Sure, he looked pretty built, but she was no size zero.

"Mmm," Usui sniffed. "You smell nice."

"Huh?" she wondered and sniffed her armpit. "Wow, my deodorant actually kicked in for once I guess…"

"No, I don't think that's it," Usui started smelling around her neck.

"Stop that!" Saya scrunched her neck into her shoulders and pushed his face away. "You're creeping on my personal space!"

"Yah yah," Usui smirked and dropped her into the cart. Saya crashed in, but recovered immediately.

"Mush! Mush!" she commanded and pointed forward.

Usui started pushing the cart, happy to oblige.

He ran pushing Saya all through the city, obeying her directions of "left!" "right!" "jaywalk!" till finally:

"Whoooah there!"

Usui braked, though he was hardly winded.

"Well that was fun," Saya stood in the cart and jumped out, then pulled out a chain and locked it on a street pole.

"You make a good sled dog," she praised him and walked off into a sketchy looking door in an alley behind a warehouse type building.

"What is this place?" Usui was scanning the surroundings.

"That's no concern of yours since you are LEAVING," she reminded him.

"Am I?" Usui scratched his head.

"You promised!" Saya held her pinky out for evidence.

"I never agreed to the leaving part of the promise. You just assumed I did."

"I figured you'd say something like that," she used the key-card to unlock the mechanism on the door. "To bad for you VIP's only." She stuck her tongue out."Sucka!" she shut the door.

Usui went over and tried the handle anyway.

Sure enough it was locked.

He looked up at the building, analyzing it. He wanted to know just what she could be doing in a place like that.

_Gang related? _

He wondered.

To be continued…

….

THANKS FOR READING! All you guys who are following the story make me so happy! I'm so glad you guys like it , and Canichan001, you may be on to something with that whole battle thing heheh.

…..

Usui will be infiltrating the Print shop coming up! But what will happen when Saya encounters Taizo while trying to get her sword back?

**Next Chapter: **_E.T. GO HOME!_


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